TVR/Janet

It is a Sunday in late April and it's too wet and windy to play outside. You finished reading Black Beauty for the umpteenth time so it is a welcome diversion when Andrew knocks on your door and asks if you want to play draughts. You set the board up on your bed and sit cross-legged, while he sits sideways with his feet on the floor.

The first game is over fairly quickly and he wins easily. As you set the board up for the second game, he says something about how girls aren't very good at games and that annoys you, because even though he's older you've always been pretty evenly matched. He wins the second game too, but only just and you go to the bathroom for a pee, while he sets the board up the third game.

When you got back on the bed, your foot was a bit twisted, so after a few moves, you get up on your knees to make yourself more comfortable and accidentally knock the board onto the floor. For some reason, this seems to annoy Andrew. "You always do that when you're losing," he says.

"That's not fair," you say and you can feel yourself going red. "Anyway, I wasn't losing."

Suddenly he turns and grabs your wrists, pushing you onto your back. You squeal and try to kick him, but he's too strong for you and you end up with him lying flat on top of you. You take a breath to shout at him, and all of a sudden his lips are pressed against yours in a far from brotherly kiss.

At first, you think " this is weird", but then he pushes his tongue between your lips and your head starts to swim. Eventually, he breaks the kiss and lets go of your arms, but stays on top of you, looking straight into your eyes. Now you realise that his penis has got hard and it's squashed between you, pressing right up against your groin.

You reach up with your arms and he flinches as if you're going to hit him, but instead you wrap them around his neck and pull him back down for a second kiss. This time you kiss him back and you both open your mouths so that your tongues can touch. Even though you're both dressed, you can feel the same sensations going through your body that you get when you rub yourself.

Your head is saying "this is wrong, he's my brother", but your body wants to do more and you're frightened. You're not frightened of your brother, you're frightened of these strange feelings that are flowing through your body.

• The fright gives you strength and you push Andrew off so hard that he falls on the floor
• You know you should push him off, but curiosity gets the better of your caution