Life Hacks/Godmode/Ubergod/It Begins: Difference between revisions
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Latest revision as of 02:09, 14 April 2018
In for a penny in for a pound as they say. With the Holiday's so easily changing their long held beliefs; it should be possibly to spread that change without nearly as much trouble as you initially thought. You would likely need to grow your new version of Christianity too. Even if they are lifies now, Jehovah and Jesus aren't likely just going to stand by and let you take their power without a fight. That means you need divine power, and divine power needs worshipers.
"Jehovah will try to take back his power from me. We need to be ready. We need to spread the truth . . . but first you'll need to know the truth. I'll teach you." Now the logistics of what you're planning hits you. You need to do this smarter. Hmmm . . . that gives you an idea. "Let's get everyone together first." With an unnecessary wave of your hand, you and the entirety of the Holiday clan find yourself in their living room in a flash of light. They seem to be quite confused on how they can be sitting (and in some cases standing) in their living room when they were . . . wherever they were before. Chris seems to be the most confused to have been suddenly transported from his workplace to his home.
You decide the best way to do this is to create a similar sense of awe that you got in the attic. You float about a foot off the ground, and cause your body to glow slightly. You maintain your halo of light at a higher level than you general glow; and try to attain an expression of peace and love with your acting skills.
"I'm sorry," you begin, "it must be a shock to you to find yourselves suddenly in your living room. I simply felt that as devout followers, and long-time friends of my vessel; you should all be the first to know that I am returned. I, Xander am Jesus of Nazareth, the Christ, returned to Earth. The truth of my existence has now been revealed to me; and so I reveal it to you; before even my own family . . . because you are my family." You see a wave of emotion surge through their faces as they look on with absolute love and trust. It makes you a little uncomfortable, but you shrug it aside for the moment.
"Unfortunately, much of what you have been told to believe is false. What I am going to tell you may be hard to process . . . but it is the truth. Please keep yourselves open to it. While I am the only child of Jehovah, he is not God of the universe. He, himself is the child of Loki, Norse god of mischief. He started off with the best intentions for humanity. He felt that it was the duty of the gods to serve man instead of man serving him. To this end he stole the Golden Apples from the gods . . . all of the gods; Norse, Greek, Celtic, Hindu . . . they all needed the golden apples to sustain their power. He hid himself so that the gods could not find him, and the apples . . . and the gods feel to sleep one by one searching for him. Only Loki had seen this coming. Only he had a small stash of apples spirited away, but he bod his time, rationing them for the time when he should act."
The Holidays are transfixed by his story, all of them seemed to be completely absorbed, not even asking question that surely must be coming to mind. A little unnerved, you continue. "As power sometimes does, being the only god in existence changed Jehovah. He began to crave power, and much of it was still being directed at the sleeping gods. He set about changing this by making his religion more aggressive. When this wasn't working to his satisfaction; he decided to use a different tactic . . . he had me. I spread my message of peace and love to the world in my time; and while it was not his message, it still gave him power . . . until I ascended to heaven that is. Once I started receiving power that he felt should be his, he sealed me away in a long sleep. Loki saw this and waited for his attention to stray. When it finally did, he stole me from under Jehovah's nose and place me in the womb of my second mother Inga. From their I had not my memories . . . but upon finding this magical doll," you motion to Cora, "that is one of many artifacts that Loki spread throughout the world, I now remember myself."
You still have them . . . maybe even more strongly. It is time to bring it home. "Jehovah is coming for the power that he feels should be his. We need to be ready for him. We need to stand against him, and remind him that the gods should serve man, not man serving the gods. To that end, we need to spread the truth . . . and we need to grow." Now the hard part. "To that end I need wives with whom to have children. I would like you Holidays to be my first wives." The clan remains quiet as you wait for a response. It's a little unnerving, waiting to see if you are believed. Chris is the first to speak, as is only natural.
Chris chuckles a bit, then says, "I'm not sure how you pulled this off Xander, but man is this a doosie. You must have been planning this prank for months. Are you using wires to float like that?" He gets up and approaches you, looking for the mechanism of your levitation. "It's funny and all, but maybe next time leave our religion out of the joke. We take that pretty seriously. And polygamy, really? We'd be more than happy if one day you married one of our daughters; but insinuating that you're going to marry them all is crossing a line . . . Is it magnets?"
"Chris," you say calmly, "I know that this would make it a lot easier for you if it were a prank; but it is not. I am the Second Coming of Christ and I need your help to keep the power of my worship from Jehovah, who has become mad with power despite his best intentions. I suppose you need proof though. Behold!" You wave your hand and everyone in the room is suddenly dressed in dresses and tuxedos. "Monogamy was not a part of my church. You did that to yourselves. A man can have as many wives as he wishes and a woman can have as many husbands as she wishes. I am asking Lynn to take me as her second husband here as well as asking your daughters to marry me. I also have no problem with homosexuality . . . that was Jehovah's problem. If the boys, or yourself, want to be my husbands . . . we can talk about it; but I'd rather they be my wives as I can transform them . . . and you . . . into females. I am, however, a firm believer in free will; and will only marry those of you who wish it.
You see Chris's face go pale as he starts to realize that this is, in fact, real. "The girls are too young . . . maybe the oldest if they wanted; but the kids?"
"It's entirely up to them, but I never had an issue with separating out who could love whom. I am all about love regardless of gender, age, familial affiliation, or species. Love is love and should be shared. For instance, did you ever wonder why incest produces flawed children more frequently than procreation with a non-relative?" Asking him about a topic he knows about as a doctor should ease him into calm discourse instead of rash action; and hopefully bring him around to your way of thinking.
"Deleterious recessive traits are more likely to be expressed in pairings of close relatives than strangers."
"It was Jehovah that gave the people and beasts of the world deleterious recessive trait to punish incest . . . which was something the gods do freely. I can remove those traits from you; allowing you to express your love for one another."
"I am NOT cheating on my wife with my daughters . . . or anyone else for that matter! I'm sure you mean well Xander; but this is all too much."
You are a little confused why he isn't just taking what you say as the best course of action. You are certain his like, submission, trust, and platonic love stats are maxed; and as soon as you question it; the information is relayed to you to confirm in. Then it hits you . . . this must be as submissive as Chris gets. Some combination of personality traits must make it more difficult to persuade him. You are contemplating how to proceed when you suddenly get an ally from an unlikely source.
"Chris darling," says Lynn as she approaches him and wraps her arm around his, pulling herself to his side, "Maybe we should listen to Xander. I believe him when he says he's the second coming . . . don't you?"
Chris thinks for a moment. "Yes, I suppose I do."
"Then shouldn't we be trying to do his will on the Earth?"
"But incest, Lynn?" says Chris. "Incest, pedophilia, bestiality . . . that's just not right . . . I can understand homosexuality being okay. That was a different era when they didn't understand those who had those attractions; but the others?"
"Are they really any different Chris?" responds Lynn as she looks up into his eyes.
"I . . . I'm not sure. Maybe not. But what about all I've learned was right? Am I supposed to just abandon my morals?"
"No, Chris, we adjust our morals base on the new information at hand."
"But God's Law -"
"Is for the Jews, we are Christians, not Jehovahians. We believe that the New Testament supersedes the Old Testament when they conflict . . . well, now we have a brand new Testament, right from the mouth of our Messiah."
Chis is wavering, what do you do?
- Nothing, Lynn has this
- Drive it home (focus on duty)
- Drive it home (focus on loyalty)
- Drive it home (focus on your relationship with the family)
- Drive it home (focus on the greater good)
Infinity Pocket, Black Hack, Others?
Xander controls the local area.
