JoS/Henriette/19th Journal - Odd Jobs

Frostfall, 14th, 4E 202

So, I haven't done much of anything lately, not anything worth writing about anyway… Nothing of note has happened. I've been trying to keep low profile, all that boring stuff… But sometimes boring is good. Boring is peaceful. Me and the girls have been able to relax and have our peace. The injury I suffered at the hand of Mercer ended up being a little worse than I initially expected, so this peace and quiet really helped me heal.

I've been at full strength for about a week now, but before I can properly return to my adventures, I've got a little job ahead of me. I'm currently heading towards Solitude for work… I wasn't planning on writing about this either, but something else happened.

There's this tower on the road that leads east from Whiterun, and I pretty often walk past it. It's pretty much the first real building I come across if I want to travel towards Whiterun. Bandits love it for some reason, but I don't care. They rarely bother me. They seem to have come up with a new tactic to extort money from travelers by demanding a toll.

It pretty quickly became apparent to me that trying to weasel my way away from paying would be dumb. I could count at least twelve of them, and they had the high ground too. Choosing to fight them would've been too risky. However, I quickly realized that I didn't have a single Septim on me. I mean, I don't travel with a lot of money either way because it's too risky, but I should've had at least three hundred on me. Did I forget to pack my money?

So, yeah… I had to offer them something else. It may have been incredibly stupid, but I wasn't really thinking rationally… It's a good thing my body was a valid payment method.

They demanded a payment of, what was it… Two hundred Drakes? I know what men usually pay for these kinds of services in those Skooma dens, or even in some sultry taverns… I'm pretty sure they fucked me for more than two hundred's worth! I didn't protest it out loud or anything, I felt like it would've just made the situation worse… Or maybe it wouldn't have even mattered, I don't know… I'm not even sure anymore.

It was an exhilarating experience, especially when you consider that I essentially let myself willingly for these people's mercy. Throughout the whole ordeal of being pounded, tied up, gagged by cloth, or being forced to suck them off, the possibility of them actually not willing to let go of me was constantly on my mind… But did I have a choice? Had I chosen to fight them from the beginning… Who knows what they would've done. They joked about throwing some of their prisoners in a cave full of horny trolls nearby, after robbing all their belongings of course. Yes, they said horny, but I think they also meant hungry, as they told about how they all must've been eaten alive.

They joked about keeping me as their little bitch as well, but in the end, they were all just jokes, because they did let me go. Maybe it was a sign of good will, maybe they just don't care about having captives, maybe they can't afford to feed a little brat, maybe they have morals… Whatever, what's done is done. They were pretty chill for a bunch of Bandits. Maybe there's some truth to what that one particular moron I once met was saying. Maybe some of these guys are bandits just because they have no other choice? I mean, I never chose to become a Vampire either, so…

Whatever, it was great sex, and that's all that matters in the end.

Considering that I travel this road very often, I may have to pay them again in the future. For now though, I think I need some rest. I'll be staying at the Bannered Mare in Whiterun. It's a good thing that I have somehow managed to better my reputation here in this hold, because there's no way I would be able to sleep here alone otherwise.

Frostfall, 20th, 4E 202

My master didn't have much of anything special in store for me. Maybe he was having a good week or something, but he didn't put me through a lot of harsh, humiliating stuff like he usually does. It was just one night of entertaining guardsmen and one night of entertaining the mercenaries that are somehow affiliated with Gulum-Ei. He did also give me a day off… Sort of. He threw me into a cell in solitary confinement and left me in there for twenty-four hours in full-body bondage… Blindfold, mouth gag, chastity belt with those stupid inflatable plugs, the entire package. Why? I don't know.

Now, it's time for me to go home, and I decided to take a scenic route. Yesterday I stopped by in Rorikstead, tonight I'm at the Sleeping Giant in Riverwood. I was planning on completing my journey home instead of stopping here, but the weather has taken a turn towards worse so I'll hang around.

Well anyway, it's a good thing I made it to Riverwood just in time to take shelter from the coming rain. The Inn there is as busy as ever and seems to be getting more popular day by day, although there weren't many locals here at noon when I arrived there after journeying through night. Two particularly rude fellows talked about needing to find peace and quiet and that they don't need to be bothered by me… But why go to an inn of all places for quiet? Especially this one? I can't stand listening to Sven sing for one minute!

I also want to write about Dorthe. You know, Alvor's daughter, pretty little thing… I discovered something rather naughty about her today.

It started with me looking for Gorr. I wanted to talk about my adventures and maybe do something else after that, but I couldn't find him. Sven, who usually just ignores me, told me that he left the inn a quarter of an hour ago. Something tells me that he was being helpful for the sole reason of getting me to fuck off.

Not few minutes after, I found him, together with Dorthe. I didn't know they have that kind of relationship. This innocent, curious little blacksmith's protégé, a young and promising smith who dreamt of becoming even better than Jourlun Greymane himself, was riding Gorr's big black Redwood with her other hand leaning forward against his muscular body, and the other covering her mouth trying to muffle her moans… And failing miserably. Okay, you wouldn't hear her through the rain, but if you walk past the little shed they're fucking in like I did, there's no way you wouldn't notice.

I'm not jealous or anything, but it rubbed me the wrong way… Okay, I admit, I might be a little jealous… I was looking for him with the intention of getting my holes pecked by him after all. I don't fault him for going after other girls, just like he doesn't fault me for seeking other men I'm sure. It's not like I'm his girlfriend or anything… But Dorthe, oh little Dorthe… I want to hold this against her somehow… I don't know how yet, but I at least wanted to let her know that I saw her. So, I wrote her a little private letter. I told the ever vigilant and responsible courier that it's for her eyes only, preferably to be delivered while she's alone.

What it reads is something along the lines of: "I saw you having an affair with Gorr. I wonder what your father would think of his precious daughter doing something that indecent." I didn't really want to write anything else in it, but it's not like I had to. I didn't even sign it using my name; instead, I just wrote "an old friend". I just want this storm cloud to hang over her head, and then maybe next time I visit Riverwood I bring it up to her.

Anyway, I'm beat, and luckily that dumb fiddler won't be here until the sun sets, meaning that I can actually get some sleep. Hopefully it won't be raining anymore when I do.

Frostfall, 25th, 4E 202

Well, these turned out to be a couple of very eventful days.

I was on a little errand to Whiterun, this time with Sissel and Serana, when I sensed a beast hunting me, stalking me in the shadows. I always get a little wary when I'm being followed, but lucky for me, this time, there wasn't actually anything to worry about. It was just my frenemy from the Companions, Ria.

She needed some help with some of her Companion work and had no-one else to turn to on this. In her own words, it hurt her pride a little to try and rely on me, but I'm the only person outside their guild that she can trust with something like this. Why couldn't she rely on her friends? Well, beats me. Honestly, considering the nature of this mission I imagined they would've all wanted to storm this place en masse, to which you'll soon surely understand the reason soon enough, my dearest diary.

It put me in a little predicament. While Ria would've been fine with my friends coming, I wasn't willing to let Sissel come along on this one, because let's be honest, she's not an adventurer, but we couldn't just send her home on her own either. I had no reason to really offer Ria help either, but truth be told, I kind of wanted to try and repair my relationship with her. That alone was a good enough reason for me.

And so, me and Ria headed south on an adventure while Serana and Sissel headed home.

First from Whiterun to Riverwood, we didn't chat at all. It was kind of tense between us, but it clearly looked like she wanted to talk. Then, from Riverwood to the ruins of Helgen, she did ask some questions about me, especially as we got closer to Helgen. I haven't actually visited my old home since "that" happened. Now that place is ran by some Bandits, a sad sight to see. They have completely taken over the old fort. Ria talked about it being some kind of base for human trafficking operations that happen between Skyrim and Cyrodiil and suggested that we should steer as clear as possible, lest we wanted to risk getting captured ourselves.

Our destination awaited just a short walk southward, closer to the Cyrodiil border. It was an old Nordic ruin up in the mountains with its name lost to the time. It had become home for necromancers practicing their magic on the corpses, but that wasn't all. The companions had recently discovered the fate of their long-lost shield-brother who disappeared on a mission somewhere here in the region a two hundred or so years ago, and Ria's mission was to avenge him and lay his soul to rest.

It wasn't a hard mission for two, but I can definitely understand why Ria wanted help… This wasn't really a quest for one.

We slept inside the tomb, just besides the entrance, as we were both getting tired, but didn't end up sleeping for long. It was time for us to continue our journey home, but our little journey together wasn't over yet. In fact, the best was still ahead…

When we got to Riverwood, me and Ria split up for a minute. She had some business at the Riverwood Trader, while I decided to visit the Blacksmith. There I unexpectedly ambushed by Dorthe while being in the middle of chatting with Alvor. She was pulling me and telling me to follow her frantically. Apparently she had figured out very quickly that it was me who wrote her that letter. She was angry at me, but above everything else, she was SO embarrassed and worried about who I might have told, especially if I was going to tell her father. Well, I'm not going to… Instead, it was time to play around with her.

I suggested that if she has a thing for Gorr, we should honestly share him and have some threesome, an idea that lit her up. I knew she would be up for it, and we were sure that Gorr would be up for it too…

I wasn't planning on telling Ria. It might've been funny if she had to look for me, and it would've been exciting too… Little did I know that this bitch also had been hiding dirty, naughty secrets from me! Me and Dorthe, we found her with Gorr. Can you believe it? More importantly, can you believe HIM? Is there not a single female in this hold that this beast of a man hasn't been able to seduce? We spied on them before they even got it on, and apparently they've done this in the past as well. No doubt they were going to fuck, no doubt Ria was planning on hiding from me in the same way I was planning on hiding from her with Dorthe… Great minds think alike, I suppose.

Me and Dorthe jumped in and surprised them when they were in the process of making out and undressing. Gorr found humor in this. Ria? Not so much. Never have I seen her so flustered before. She wasn't even her usual angry self. No, she was just straight up beet red after being exposed. Dorthe then took the words out from my mouth when she said, "why are you having fun without us?". From there, we had fun for at least an hour.

While Dorthe wanted to make out with Gorr, me and Ria decided to bond a little by sharing his dick and licking and rubbing it at the same time… An incredibly fun experience if I may say so. He didn't last long being toyed by us and came all over our faces. After that, me and Ria actually shared a kiss. Never did I think I would ever kiss this girl, never ever, but it was actually pretty great.

Dorthe, as greedy as she is, wanted to lick Gorr clean before taking him in. Me and Ria were left to be pleasured by his hands, but that was only for a while. He wanted to do us all one by one, and he wanted to cum in all of us. Dorthe didn't let him, but luckily for him, me and Ria were fine with it.

I could go into more detail, but I'm sure you get the gist of it already… We had a whole lot of fun. On the way to Whiterun, me and Ria bonded some more, talked a lot… She apologized deeply for asking me to go along with her selfish request. Well, I just told her, she owes me one, and that was that. She then thanked me and hugged me when we got back to Whiterun and she promised to spread good word for me with the Companions to help me fix my reputation further in this hold further. It's good to know that she no longer views me as an evil creature like she used to. I feel like I really made a good friend out of her, and I'm sure she feels the same.

Frostfall, 27th, 4E 202

I don't want to admit it, my book of secrets, but the recent things that have happened to me, the things I've been forced to do, the things I've been pressured to do, and even done willingly… It's like I enjoy those things more day by day. Is it okay for me to enjoy those things? Well, that's not an easy question, as I never actively seek to be defiled. Of course, I always enjoy consensual acts, but at the end of the act, consensual or not, my body responds in the exact same waves of pleasure and rapture.

The real question is, it is safe? I suppose it depends on your definition of safety, and I'm not even sure if I want to go there and start debating different definitions… Perhaps, if I were to look at things from another perspective, you could say that being an adventurer is more unsafe than being a whore, a bitch, a slut, whatever it is that I'm supposed to identify with… Excitement and danger are also a big part of why I enjoy adventuring, a big part of why I enjoy crime.

It made me also think about that one band of Bandits about a week back, when I essentially let them have their way with me after failing to pay their tolls. I wonder if it would be okay for me to do something like that again and willingly let myself at mercy of Bandits? If I went to that same group again, no doubt they would let me go like the did the last time. If my freedom was to be guaranteed and I knew it, why not? But the problem is, that also could lead down a dead end path. Getting captured by those involved in slave trade could very easily prove to be a nail in the coffin of my adventures at worst, or an experience comparable to that I had in Cidhna mine at best… Oh, but that's only if I were to do this alone. My friends have proved to be helpful in the past and I've always made it somehow…

I know this could be the dumbest thing I've done in my entire life but I kind of want to take the risk and roll the dice again… Would I dare, or should I just let the destiny roll it for me in my stead? I don't know what I'll do in the future, but for now, I think I'll try to control myself…