Memoir of a Child Slut/Chapter 4
An utter wreck. That's what I became. I would mope around the house all day, refusing to eat, refusing to shower, bursting into tears without any warning. My mother's latest boyfriend eloquently said that I was a fucking buzzkill. Soon enough I was shipped away so that they didn't have to deal with me.
Kerri also wanted to know why I was a buzzkill. My behavior didn't change after I got it to her house. I cried and sulked and grieved over my loss. I no longer had purpose; I was merely existing. Once Kerri pried out of me what was the matter, she became convinced that I just needed to suck cock to feel better. I wasn't interested. I'd made it almost 2 years ‘sober' at this point and the only cock I was ever actually interested in sucking was Tom's. Of course Kerri knew better.
She brought her boyfriend over one morning. Trey was older than Kerri. He was at least as old as Bobby was when I blew him two years ago, and Bobby had moved out already. Trey was very friendly with me, extremely chatty. He played with my messy hair and complimented me lots. When I continued ignoring his advances, Kerri offered him up to me on a silver platter. She stripped him naked right in front of me while I sat on the floor then showed off his penis like a prize on a game show. Frankly I thought she was bragging. Yeah, he was in great shape with immaculate hair, and his soft dick looked like a fleshy banana. But he was also a douchebag. I knew that and I'd only known him for an hour. Kerri jerked his dick to life, expecting me to just leap at this opportunity. I could hardly stand to look. But Kerri always got what she wanted.
My cousin got behind me and guided me to my knees. Then Trey stepped forward. I pushed at his thighs but he grabbed my wrists and held my arms up into the air. His dick poked at my face and I shook my head from side to side trying to evade him. Kerri yanked on my hair by the roots and quickly took control of my thrashing head. Just the pain of her stretching my scalp forced my mouth open. Trey didn't pass on that opportunity.
"Just relax," she hummed into my ear. I listened. Nothing mattered anyway.
Despite all my stubbornness, it was jarring to discover that Kerri was right. I still had such an oral fixation within me, a desire to put my mouth to good use. As soon as it was in I sucked without even thinking. It had been a long time but this was so familiar to me that it was oddly comforting. Taking a warm stiff dick in my mouth gave me some sort of meaning again. All the same, I teared up from my learned shame and humiliation from being violated and forced to blow some strange guy. But that was mostly to save face. Kerri had just brought my walls down.
My second mentor turned me into a cocksucker.
The unfortunate part was that I was no longer in control of this situation. After a gentle warm up Kerri decided to become ruthless and slammed my head forward in rapid succession, using me like a toy on her boyfriend's junk. Grunting his approval Trey bucked along with it, dipping his cock further down the back of my throat with every forward stroke of my head. Slamming my nose against his shaved crotch was uncomfortable but the least of my worries. Breathing was the toughest. I fought my gag reflex for a long time, clearing out mucus and holding back my breakfast while my body tried to wretch. I had no choice but to hold my breath while I was facefucked. That did help a little but I was still in a rough spot, because when you're used like a sex toy other people are only willing to help themselves. They did let me breathe here and there when I started flailing but I knew better than to waste my breath on begging or bargaining. I just sobbed, whimpered, and let them use me.
Tears streamed down my face as I did everything I could to tilt my head and elongate my neck to make Trey's cock slide past my tonsils more freely. But even with small successes I just couldn't take it. I doubt any 10 year old could. After a few minutes off and on with a dick in my throat, milk and fruit loops sprayed past Trey's glans and splashed down his shaft and balls. He was stunned by this but Kerri was hardly phased. She just nattered away in my ear and kept jerking my head back and forth. She said all sorts of things, telling me not to worry, I needed this, deserved this, that I can clean it later, to take it deeper, all while using her boyfriend's lengthy high school member to plunge out my breakfast.
After the first time I puked, Trey stepped forward and widened his stance to avoid the milk I spilled on the floor. With him forcing me to lean back that meant that my next expulsion spilled over my chin and ran down my own body. I caught a breath every now and then but the two of them were unrelenting. I puked several more times before I emptied my stomach, totally soaking my clothes in milk and bits of rainbow. Once I was empty, I continued to dry heave and convulse my tongue against that cock until he came. I'm actually really proud that I managed to make it through all of that so young. That wasn't easy, and it was just a sad mix of my limp patheticness and detachment that brought me through to the other side virtually unscathed. I was exhausted after, but if I fought them I might've actually hurt myself.
When Trey blew his load down my throat I coughed and choked while my tonsils squeezed his pulsing meat releasing load after load. I hardly even had to swallow, his semen flowing freely into my belly. I recognized that this transaction of sorts, taking a shot in the mouth, would probably be the closest thing I would ever get to being with Tom again. When they let go of me I crumpled to the ground and balled my eyes out. Kerri sat with me and petted my hair, simultaneously praising me with how hot that was and belittling me for making a big deal about it. But they weren't tears of pain or abuse; they were my last tears for Tom.
I blew so many dicks that month. It was all because of Kerri. She gave me a few days rest but I could tell what was coming with how much she was buttering me up and mentioning me to everyone she knew. She started passing me around, loaning me out to friends of hers and Trey's. It would always start the same way with her eating my pussy all sweetly and softly, often to wake me up after a late night, and after teasing me to no end she would have me agreeing to do all sorts of shit just so I could 'earn' an orgasm from her. She sure knew how to eat pussy.
I was constantly worried that we would get caught, that I would get forced into therapy again, but I did what Kerri wanted anyway. After being a good girl for so long it was really hard to admit that I enjoyed sucking cock and liked swallowing cum even more. It was easier to think I didn't have a choice and was being forced into all this, but in reality I missed my afternoon snacks.
The first time she showed me off at one of her friend's houses she treated me like meat. Kerri ordered me to strip then wrestled my clothes off me when I hesitated, not doing it fast enough for her liking. She bagged my clothes like I didn't deserve them and retrieved a sharpie, writing a single word across my flat chest: "virgin". It was literally in quotes, like it was a joke. And she kept making jokes like how slutty 10 year olds are now and that my mouth was probably tighter than my pussy. There wasn't a large number of people, relatively speaking. Maybe 4 other girls and 2 guys, not counting Trey. Her girl friends laughed at me, some of them laying me down to finger and spread my vagina. Her guy friends tried to fuck me but Kerri always denied them. They still put my mouth to good use, so they hardly complained.
That first time was the craziest by far. Every time after that was a lot more casual, or if Kerri did get ceremonial there were only 1 or 2 other people with us. I always behaved, doing my best to take everything thrown at me with a bubbly smile, finding internal validation from my mouthful of cum at the end of it all. It went on like this for a couple weeks. I probably only blew five different guys total, but it felt like I downed a football team's worth of cum before I mounted any kind of protest to stand up for myself. Even then I kept blowing whoever she put in front of me. Somehow she knew both what I needed and what I was capable of better than I did. Once Kerri was less denigrating I eventually came away from those coerced blowjobs with a grin on my face and a spring in my step. It might be a weird way to gain confidence, but it worked for me. It was a treat to make boys cum. I was special again.
Kerri was really terrible, but she made me feel so good. Most of the time. There was only one flagrantly evil thing that she did. She let her boyfriend fuck me on the last day of the summer. Just like that, after protecting it for weeks she gave away my cherry to her boyfriend like it was nothing. Supposedly she wanted to help me get over Tom. That's what Trey said anyway, that it was all her idea. Mind you, he said this as he literally tore my clothes off and fucked me on a dirty mattress in the middle of the woods.
I hardly fought him as he forced me down and penetrated me. I was a little scared but also far too used to Trey and Kerri roughing me up by then. And as fucked up as all that was, a pre-5th grade preteen girl getting raped by some high schooler, I didn't even mind. Don't get me wrong, it was a little traumatic at the time. But in hindsight he was underwhelming. He wasn't a good fuck by most any standard. That said, I did get something from him that made it all worth it. I've been a cum whore since I was 6, but my first and only taste of my own freshly deflowered preteen pussy mixed with that high schooler's thick salty cum was something special, a one-of-a-kind flavor I still dream about to this day and will never ever forget.
I'll also never forget how quickly he got himself ready for another round because I was still on my back fingering the last bits of cum out of my trembling pussy when he forced himself inside me for a second time. He really went to town then, fucked me halfway off the mattress. He also lasted a lot longer his second go, and if I hadn't already been bleeding from the first round I definitely would have been after the second. I just waited for it to be over, gasping if not hyperventilating in time with his crazed thrusts.
Once he was done he thanked me by patting my crotch and giving me a gross kiss that I only returned reflexively. He then reminded me not to miss my ride home before leaving me all alone to clean up my leaking pussy and pull my mangled clothes back together all by myself. He truly was a romantic at heart.
That month I was away was both terrible and wonderful. I had to deal with my heartache and endure the desecration and obliteration of the chaste self image I had built. Even if it was all a lie, it still hurt to have that lie taken away. But it also hurt for all the work that I had done to be for nothing. So even if I fought my own internal battles for a while, in the end I appreciated that Kerri helped me rediscover and embrace my superpower. I loved showing it off. I loved the attention. And if I had to do it all over again the only thing I'd change is to suck every one of those boys' dicks just a little bit harder.