JoS/Kanna/Karim's Backstory

First Entry

My life's been full of ups and downs since I was forced to leave my childhood home, but now, more so than ever, I feel like every day could be my last. That's why I want to write this down now because there's no guarantee I will live to see another sunrise, and my greatest fear right now is to just fade away and be another nobody, forgotten.

My name is Karim, and I've been orphaned ever since my parents were murdered in a bandit raid in the Midyear of 423. Now, I have only two things left from those days: my father's sword, which I carry on my hip, and my mother's locket, which I carry around in my pocket at all times. They're my lucky charms, for the lack of a better word. Then, there's my little sister Kanna, who I've been separated from for some time now. She's the only family I have left, the light of my life, and the only person I truly care about in this world besides myself. Even with us being apart now, she is still my motivation for pushing myself out of bed every day to start a new day.

We were both taken in by the bandits, who raised us from that point onwards. In truth, we were little more than hostages. It wasn't a relationship of mutual respect. I hated the chief, while he saw me as nothing more than a useful tool. His name was… No, actually, never mind… He's now dead, and I don't think his corpse deserves the courtesy of having a name.

I was forced to do many things in my life, starting with simple thievery and banditry, highway robberies, targeting innocent, defenseless civilians, women and farmers, merchants. Then, by the time I reached adolescence, I took my first life and eventually participated in sexual assault. All these crimes, all these sins, I don't know if I can truly ever pay for. I hope I can, but if not, I'll take my regrets down to the grave with me. I was motivated back then by only survival, not only mine but also my sister's. I did horrible things for us to survive, for I knew he had Kanna at the end of his blade. I just had to do it all… I couldn't bear the idea of something terrible happening to her… I know it doesn't excuse my crimes, but can you blame me?

I knew it couldn't go on forever though. I was still hungry for revenge, salivating at the idea of making those people pay for what they've done to me and my family. I succeeded, but at what cost?

After leaking information about an upcoming bandit raid to the guardsmen of Chorrol, telling them the clan's travel route and battle plan down to the last detail, they set up an ambush. I thought that would be the end of it; they would all die in this ambush, after which my sister and I would finally gain our freedom… But things just didn't go at as I anticipated.

Before I could go on my own way to tell the bandits to go ahead with their plan, two guardsmen blocked my path and drew their blades. The man I had just told about the plan, the captain of the guard, said that he knew about the raid and said that he's very thankful for me. More than anything, he was grateful that he would finally be able to get his just revenge against the bandits who had taken his family away from him. He insisted on me facing justice as well.

I tried reasoning with him, telling him that I'm motivated by revenge as well; I told him my parents' lives were taken by these same bandits, but he didn't believe me. In his eyes, I was part of the very bandits that killed his family. I was sympathetic towards him for going through the same things I've gone through, but also angry at him for his blindness and inability to see the truth for what it was. It left me no choice but to try to escape, and I failed. My unwillingness to draw and strike my father's blade, and take a life on my way out, cost me dearly, and I allowed myself to be captured. All I could do was feel the iron tighten around my wrists as the two guards held me down against the floor. "We'll meet again soon", is what the captain told me next as he prepared to leave for duty. "I'm finally able to retire after today", were the last things I heard him utter.

I was so damn angry at the time. I was supposed to be on my way to the battlefield. I was naïve enough to think I would be able to join the fight by the side of the law, but now the only thing on my mind was Kanna. I so, so wanted to get to her, to save her. There was no telling what could happen to her now. Since those damn fools mistook me for an enemy even after I helped them and leaked info to them, which made me fear they could also mistake my sister for a real bandit. I was genuinely terrified she might die. I struggled with all my might, trying to tell the two guards holding me that I was on their side, but they weren't having it. They said that I was going to be hauled straight to jail.

I couldn't let it happen.

Somehow, I managed to escape. I freed myself from their grasp after tackling one to the ground, and I ran away. Still bound by the steel, I knew I couldn't fight, and there was no doubt in my mind that they wouldn't hesitate to kill me at this point, especially with them all alerting everyone in the city about an escaped criminal. People made way for me, looking scared, horrified of me, staring at me with their judgmental gazes. I guess they must've really thought I was a bad guy… Not like it matters. I was able to make it away.

Still, the matter of chains on my wrists persisted. They weren't made from top-grade material, and I felt that with some struggling and maybe even some violence and grinding against stone and wood, I could possibly make it out. It took so long. I was grinding my teeth, trying to muffle my rage and swearing. My wrists were sore, hurting, and bloody, but damn it, I was going to make it out to take my sister and escape with her even if it meant losing a fucking hand! It must've taken ten, maybe fifteen minutes, but I struggled myself free from the chains.

Now, in the middle of the woods, in an unfamiliar part of the city outskirts, I ran like mad for a short while, trying to figure out a way back to the camp. I kept praying, please, to all the gods, even though I had never earnestly prayed for anything before, to please just let me be in time, let my sister just be safe. All I could do was pray!

And then, finally, by the time I made it back to the camp, all I found were imperial officers and guardsmen from Chorrol looting the bandit camp and searching for evidence. No bandit was left there, and based on my extensive survey, neither was my sister. I was staring at the aftermath of a raid.

It was at that point that I realized I was late. I had failed in protecting her.

Second Entry

Three months have passed since that day, and now I'm truly alone in this world. I live my life as a traveling mercenary, picking up any jobs I can just so I can eat well and sleep peacefully. In that sense, I'm still motivated by the same thing as before, and that's survival.

I try my best to not do anything illegal, but other than that, I'll do just about anything so I can survive to see tomorrow. Pest control, hunting down goblins or bandits… There sadly isn't much use for people like me in these lands, and people scoff at me when I reveal my "profession" to them in local inns and taverns. According to them, it's strange for someone to be an independent mercenary when the Fighter's Guild takes care of jobs like this. They often suggest I must be some kind of criminal or a reject of society for not being part of them.

I guess they are right in that part. I am both a reject and a criminal, but hey, at least I'm working to clean my name, as difficult as it may be. Either I gain enough reputation to clean my name and become someone worthy, or I die trying. Live by the sword, die by the sword, as they say… I treat every day and every single battle like my last, and you'd better damn believe you will follow these same rules if you cross blades with me. It's kill or be killed for me.

On that note, if you are someone who killed me, well… First of all, congratulations, I hope I proved to be a worthy opponent, someone worth remembering, and second of all… Tell my tale to anyone willing to hear. Don't let me be forgotten like so many warriors before me.

Still, more than wanting to be somebody right now, I want to reunite with my sister. I know she's out there somewhere. She was arrested, that much I'm sure of. I've heard rumors of a unique detention center for children and youngsters somewhere in the Imperial City Prison, and those rumors aren't very pleasant. According to what I've heard, the conditions there are stringent, if not outright abusive. I hope there's nothing illegal going on there… Can't help but have this sick feeling in my stomach…

My guess is that she's there, but there's no way for me to know for sure, and saving her from there just isn't an option. It's impossible. Just trying it would be a suicide, no matter how mighty of a warrior you may be. Besides, it would go against my vow to not commit any crime. If I tried to "save" my sister through crime, I can't see that helping me or her long-term.

As for paying up her bounty? Well, I doubt she even has one… Once you commit enough crime, the Empire just gives up having bounties in the first place and instead puts a death warrant on you. At that point, you either die by some mercenary's hand like a bandit, or you're captured and get thrown behind bars for years, maybe decades, maybe even the rest of your life… That is if they won't execute you. My point is, money can't probably buy her freedom, and even if it could, there's my own bounty to worry about. I'm not exactly sure what my bounty would even be, considering all the killing, thieving, and banditry I've committed… Even rape, that one time… I probably have a death warrant of my own. My only hope is that I'll never be recognized. It has served me pretty well so far, considering I'm a stranger to the lands of Cyrodiil, having racked up most of my bounties in Hammerfell. I get dirty looks from guards in the cities I go to, but nobody has ever even thought about arresting me for anything.

That's about everything there is to me right now. I'm just a bitter, directionless mercenary worried about whether I can eat a hot meal tomorrow or not.

Let this journal also be my will, you know, in case I die. Everything I own now belongs to you, whoever you might be, the person who killed me… I hope you're a person… Wouldn't want to be killed by a damn beast… It probably isn't much, but you'll get a cheap armor, a shield, my rusty-ass sword passed to me down from my dead father, my mother's locket, which probably has no monetary value to you, and maybe even some pocket money if you're lucky.

That's it. That's my story.

Third Entry

I didn't intend to write anymore, but now another three months have passed, and I think my life is at crossroads. I have a choice in front of me, which will, without a doubt, set a course not only for my immediate future but for the rest of my very life.

It started on a small off-road tavern known as the Inn of Ill Omen. It offers just about the cheapest lodging you can find in all of Tamriel, and for a reason. The place is a fucking dump with its dark brown walls rotting in. Sleeping in this mold-infested dump for too often will probably give you a nasty headache and never-ending flu.

Alongside the Nord who runs the place, there works a young lady, about my age, also a Nord, but I'm not sure if these guys are related. Her name is Erika. Not sure what her role here is either, but she enjoys the company of visitors, and every time I visit here, she listens to my dry explanations of all the boring shit I've done with great interest and genuine glee in her eyes. She's stupidly optimistic and happy, like a human embodiment of a sugar rush.

I should also mention that she's smoking hot. Average height, great figure, nice perky tits, thick bright-red lips, and ocean blue eyes paired with wavy golden blonde hair, and those hips… Well, I seduced her on my second visit here. She was into me, and I was into her. That's an easy match-up.

Not sure if she has a thing for getting fucked by travelers or if it's just me, but she's damn wild in the bedroom nonetheless. On our first visit, she said that I'm the first Redguard she's ever laid down with and asked if it's true what they say about our dicks: "Are they really bigger than average?" Well, I've never compared my dick to anyone else's, but at least she moaned about me being huge when I presented my shehai to her face.

She gives the best head. Granted, she's the only bitch to have ever sucked my dick, but I imagine her being exceptional. She makes me nut so quick. She's like melting-hot butter, and she twirls her tongue around with such unbelievable skill. She's not afraid to fondle my balls either, which makes it all the better.

As much fun it's to have her give me head, fucking her is honestly even better. I never get tired of banging her. She's so damn tight and sensual, and like I said, wild in bed, noisy too. All of this, by the way, is critically important to my story. I'm not just bragging about slaying some prime teen pussy. Manheim, the owner, doesn't care about me fucking Erika, or maybe he's into being on the sidelines as she moans like it's everyone's business…

So, what's this about? Yesterday, we weren't the only three people in the inn. There was a fourth person who I didn't know about, a young Breton female by the name of Renault, and let me tell you in advance right now, she's a certified badass.

When I was leaving in the morning, she stopped me in the front yard, asking if Erika and I had a good time. "Oh, so you heard that", I asked, a little embarrassed, to which she just smirked and said that you could probably hear us fucking all the way to Bravil. She was clearly teasing me, but she was being cool about it, so I took a liking to her. Maybe she was coming onto me? Wouldn't mind that, because she's hot too. Young and busty females are always hot. Didn't get a chance to bed her, sadly. Teasing me about having loud sex wasn't why she approached me, though.

She couldn't help but notice that I'm a mercenary, and she said she might need some help with something promising good pay. I still had no idea who she was at that point, but I could see that she had a real fancy sword on her hip, so obviously, I could tell that she was serious. Long story short, she was sent here on a mission with two of her allies, but those two men died in an ambush. She wasn't sure if she could handle it alone, so that's where I - a stranger - came in.

We were up against bandits… I think? Cultists, maybe, they were a weird bunch, that's for sure, not your ordinary criminals. Renault didn't omit many details.

I also mentioned that she's a badass, didn't I? Well, it became evident when we actually fought side by side. I've never seen a girl that can handle a sword that well. Never mind her being a girl, I have never seen anyone handle a sword like that, period. Both her stance and her striking style were somewhat unorthodox, but deadly. I can't imagine such a stance working with a longsword or a scimitar, but her style was perfect for a long and delicate blade such as the one she was using. She straight-up cut everything she wanted in half. Like, she's better than me, that's for sure, and can't be much older than me either. She's in her late teens, I think.

Needless to say, we crushed our competition, and Renault was happy. She paid me with three hundred gold Septims, which is way more than I have ever been paid for anything in my entire life. I was over the moon. She also said that there's a lot more of where that came from if I happen to be interested. I wondered what she meant by that, and after that, she just laughed and said that she totally forgot to introduce herself.

She's with the motherfucking Blades. They're the Emperor's bodyguard. Can you believe that? This girl is a Blade, a high-ranking officer in the Imperial Palace Regiment nonetheless.

I guess you can also tell what she meant by "a lot more of where that came from", as she was impressed with my fighting skills. "Someone like you should join the Blades", she said, also saying that she has a good feeling about me. She described me as someone who fights with purpose and respect, both towards himself, the opponent, and his blade, just like a Yokudan sword-singer of legends. Never before had I heard such praise! She said that I should go visit the Cloud Ruler Temple, and told me to think about her suggestion. We walked back to the inn, after which we went separate ways.

I'm so damn conflicted about this. I mean, that's a solid income and a way for me to really turn my life around for the better, but would someone like me, someone with a criminal past, ever get away with being part of such an organization? Can anyone even join just like that? I fear my past will be revealed in due time, and joining an organization like that would simply hasten the inevitable.

No, actually… There's no need for me to be conflicted because I won't be doing it for just myself. I have to consider Kanna too. I will be reunited with her one day, and when I do, I want to be able to provide for her. My sister is strong-willed and talented, I know that much, but she also lacks certain qualities that would help her live her life independently and has always relied on others for everything. I doubt she can even read or write, unless she's been able to hone those skills in captivity.

Yeah, fuck it. I'll join the Blades. It might not help me become "somebody", as becoming a "Blade" will make me another servant and a puppet for the Emperor, but if it will help me secure a safer and more prosperous life for myself and my sister, that choice is a no-brainer.

Fourth Entry

It's been about two weeks since I've joined the Blades. Kind of. Didn't end up "joining" them right away.

I visited Bruma, a large city up the mountains right beside the border to Skyrim, and from there, I traveled northeast to the Cloud Ruler Temple, headquarters of the Blades. I soon learned that Captain Steffan can be very selective when it comes to advancing someone to be a true Blade. If you can't get in through a recommendation or a direct invitation from a high-ranking officer, you join as an apprentice. Steffan accepts almost anyone to train, provided you don't have a criminal history. Since he didn't know about my past, he has let me train at the temple.

So far, I've been able to make a very positive impression here. I mean, not to suck my own dick or anything, but I am a master swordsman, so it's only natural for them to be impressed with my swordsmanship. There are other great, talented kids here too, like this fellow Redguard around my age called Baurus. He's not as good as me, but he's an excellent second-best rookie after me. He will tell you otherwise, say that he's the best, but that's fine. I love that competitive fire in him. He seems like a great guy with a great personality in many other aspects too, and has a particularly fantastic sense of humor. We've become fast friends.

Yesterday, everything changed. I was called into the captain's office, and met Steffan face to face. He first said something that made me very happy and complimented me on my skills, calling me one of the most promising apprentices he's ever seen, only to tear down all my hype about being praised. He said he remembers me talking about being a traveling mercenary and an orphan from Hammerfell, and then also told that my description matches that of a criminal who has a death warrant on his head in Chorrol.

The silence was long and deafening. All I could think was that I was in deep shit.

"Come clean", he said, resting his chin against his crossed fists. "There's nobody but us two here."

I supposed it would be in my best interest to start from the beginning and tell him everything. Well, I didn't really talk as much initially, as I just told him to read my journal. He asked me to expand on some parts, and it seems like he's not too bothered by any of this. He even smirked when reading stat stuff about me and Erika, which made me a little ashamed.

Lastly, he said he can't blame me for what I did in my situation, even saying almost anyone would've done the same, and he seems to believe me too. He thinks I'm a good kid, which was a massive relief for me. However, he said that I shouldn't remain in Cyrodiil.

I thought I would be relieved from my position of being an apprentice there and then, but he went on to talk about how I could be a powerful asset for the Emperor in another province. He thought about it for a moment, and he said that he has a perfect job for me in mind. That job takes place in Morrowind. He didn't tell me what this job is about. Apparently, I'll learn that once I reach my destination. Oh, and he officially welcomed me to the Blades too.

I guess I must've made a really good impression on him to assign me on a mission like this, or maybe it was to protect me or Blades' reputation… Perhaps it's a mix of all three sprinkled with motives I don't know…

Morrowind, huh? That's the home of the Dark Elves, a place I never have even thought about visiting, considering that it's quite a walk away from my home in Hammerfell. I don't even know much about their customs or anything like that, apart from the fact that the lands ruled by elves are pretty alien to those run by men. It'll probably be fine though.

This morning I packed up everything after getting a good night's sleep. I've told nobody the truth about why I'm leaving. Baurus seems really bummed out, but he wished me all the best regardless. I hope I come across him one day. As I said, he's such a great and friendly guy.

Now I'm staying in Bruma. I had to buy supplies and shit for the upcoming trip. Wish I could afford a horse, as it would make travel much quicker, but then again, I wouldn't be able to take it along my journey once I set off to travel on a boat. That's right, I won't be staying in the mainland and instead make my way to the city of Balmora to meet up with the local leader of the Blades, Caius Cosades. He'll fill me in with details of my job in full.

In a strange way, I'm looking forward to what will come of my trip there, even though I must admit, I don't like the idea of the growing distance between me and my sister.

Backstories

• Aliya's Backstory
• Kanna's Backstory
• Karim's Backstory

Onward

• 1st Journal - Agent (By Aliya)