JoS/Kanna/15th Journal - Service to Two Gods

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Morning Star, 16th, 3E 428

We won't spend too much time in Balmora, as we're leaving tomorrow morning. Still, even if it's just for one day, it's always nice to see familiar faces and sleep under familiar blankets.


Karim said he's happy for me starting to grow up properly with my menstruation starting, and while I'm "plenty cute" already, he also said he can't wait to see just what kind of a strong woman I'll grow up to be. When he puts it that way, he sure does make it sound a bit exciting. I'll be turning ten this year as well. It really won't be long until I'm in my teens either!


For work with Thieves Guild, Habasi has nothing for me or Aliya, but suggested that we should visit other ringleaders, who might have something instead. She specifically mentioned Big Helende, who runs a business in Dirty Muriel's Cornerclub in the shadow of the Wolverine Hall, just south of Sadrith Mora.


As for active Morag Tong writs, I was trusted with only one. It's another petty contract, this time paid and bankrolled by Hlaalu to get rid of a treasury worker who embezzled quite a lot of money from them before going on a run and seeking refugee within a gang of criminals housing themselves in the sewers of St. Delyn. We're going towards Vivec City next anyway, so I have no problems getting rid of this guy. Still, a death sentence is a rather steep price to pay for mere theft of money, is it not? That must've been a huge sum of cash he stole! I'm hoping that the payment for a job well done will be equally big!







Morning Star, 18th, 3E 428

I had to walk into the holy city alone, as Aliya couldn't risk being seen by the Ordinators. She waited for me in Castle Ebonheart, or in Six Fishes Inn to be specific.


Getting to St. Delyn district was fairly easy, and finding our way to the sewers, also so. I really don't get why people call this city confusing. There are just seven cantons, eight if you count the temple, nine if you also count the palace. They layout is simple and every damn building is built in the same way, so why the controversy? Anyway, just because something's easy doesn't mean it's fun. Sewers are never fun places. They're smelly and filled with rats!


We - as in me and Staada - thought we found the place we were looking for when we found a door being guarded by a Nord male. He was not easy pickings for sneak with his back against the door, so I was gonna have hard time. Staada suggested we should try to flank him, so we did. That's when something surprising happened.


This man didn't take arms, nor did he even seem displeased at our presence. He immediately recognized Staada as an Aureal and couldn't believe it, loudly asking out loud what a Golden Saint was doing in this place. Surprised by his friendly attitude, I told him that she's my servant and under my direct control. He then asked me if I've come here to pay tribute to the Mad God? He called this a holy ground, as for behind these doors we would find Ihinipalit, the busiest shrine of Sheogorath in all of Morrowind, a place of worship, stories and generally speaking, just overall happiness. Turned out, this wasn't the place we were looking for, but we let ourselves be invited in anyway, as Staada seemed convinced it was going to be perfectly safe.


The shrine was rather small, consisting of the actual statue in the middle, as well as three cozy bedrooms, with pathways leading to them through each wall of this square room. Haki the Nord introduced me to his good pals Ormax and the leader Bjadmund. Ormax the Breton was a pretty quiet guy, while Bjadmund the Nord was loud and boisterous as all hell. Such a friendly guy though, albeit also a creepy, had that "my perverted uncle" vibe in my opinion. This bald Nord kept asking me if I'm ticklish, and that he loves tickling cute kids and making them laugh, calling himself a master tickler, talking about his soft touch of laughter. I'm not exactly sure what to make of him, but he sure has that madness to him you can expect from a follower of Sheogorath.


I also asked for the man I was looking for, and they told me that they would be honored to assist me on my righteous quest of taking this foul, foul bandit down. That's exactly what happened. Those three helped me and Staada kill every last bandit in their lair.


As soon as we returned to the shrine, they urged me to approach the altar at the foot of the statue. It was the first time I had actually taken a good look at it, but there was something so familiar about this man with a walking cane. His visage was in form of an Imperial man with a long beard and a fluffy mustache, dressed in exquisite Nibenese garments. Something about it just reminded me of that man I met when I was four, the one that showed me pretty magic tricks when I was feeling down, the one who told me that I too had the power to cast such pretty spells.


"Welcome, welcome", the booming voice spoke with great energy put into both words, as the voice of a god reached to me from Oblivion. He stated that it's so good for him to actually meet me again. It's been such a long time since then, he said, and he's so very proud of seeing what an adorable specimen of a brown little girl I've grown up to be. He all but confirmed to me that he was indeed the man who I met that day. But how? I didn't know that the daedric princes could just walk on Tamriel so freely… I mean, it shouldn't be possible? Not anymore anyway… Maybe there are exceptions…


He went on to say that he has blessed me with many great gifts. First, it was just encouragement, but then also an ability to tap into his realm for a higher level of magic. His latest gift to me was a certain little commander, that hotheaded and unpredictable girl which no other mortal has never been able to tame before me. He was obviously referring to Staada, but to speak of her as a "commander" makes me wonder if she actually special herself.


Why has he done all this? Well, does he need a fucking reason? He's the prince of madness! According to him though, he's lately taken a greater interest in mortals due to him searching for a perfect champion. I suppose that makes me a candidate for that? He also said that there's very little he's asked of me in return, which has mostly been due to him not finding me capable, at least not yet. Now though, now that he has molded me with his image in mind, now that I'm starting to show the "characteristics of insanity and madness", he'll be happy to set me on a glorious quest! It'll serve as a real test for whether I truly have what it takes.


"First", he said, "I know what you want. I know what you talked with my wee Saint about, and I know it interests you, you little pervert. Don't even try to deny it! You wish to tap to the magic so debaucherous that even my good pal Sanguine would approve of! Fear not, you can do it! Don't believe me? I know just the man who can prove it to you! We'll be crushing two bugs with one stone here!"


That was the end of that encounter, and I turned towards Bjadmund, who would give me the details on my epic quest. I must first find my squire, he said, an Argonian by the name of Big Head, living in seclusion on an island in the Sheogorad region. Big Head in turn would provide me with a holy, dragon-slaying relic which I would first train to use and wield, and then use to rescue a princess. I pressed him on the question of dragons, and he confirmed to me that "Oh yes, it's a fearsome dragon you'll be slaying". He also said he's eagerly awaiting for my return, and reminded that he's always up for some tickling if I'm interested, but only if I consent. He claimed that consent just makes tickling hotter or something.


In other news, I met up with Eno, who was happy with me recovering two pieces of the Webspinner set, saying that it would really seem that we're dealing with Dagonists after all. Makes sense why he's had so little luck recovering these pieces from hunting down Dark Brotherhood members. For now though, he said I should await further orders, come back in a week or so. There's not much work to be done right now, and he says he's gonna do some research on where secret shrines of Mehrunes Dagon could be located.


That concludes my business in Vivec City. Man, what a day. I did not expect to meet up with a cult worshipping Sheogorath, much less to commune with the Mad God himself. I really don't even know what to make of all this. Have I really been blessed by him or something? Besides, it's not just him either; Mephala and Mehrunes Dagon also took an interest on me… I mean, why? I'm a nobody, am I not? Or is this just normal? I guess some of these daedra love dealing with us mortals…


I also asked Staada about her thoughts, to which she said that it's true that Sheogorath has allowed me to take control of her, but that she doesn't ultimately mind, because like she's said before, she likes me. Well, that makes me happy at least… It's good to know she's being genuine and not just acting nice because I'm her mistress.


In any case, tomorrow we'll travel to Molag Mar. It's a town directly to the east from Suran, not too far away. We should probably get there in one day.







Morning Star, 19th, 3E 428

Molag Mar reminds me of Vivec City a lot. It's basically just one canton, almost identical to those you find in the holy city, except that it doesn't have a roof over its uppermost floor, its plaza. I guess there's also the fact that this place is in the middle of a volcanic wasteland instead of beautiful greenery, but whatever. This, too, is a holy site, and a popular way-stop here in the volcanic wastes of Molag Amur. The Temple's presence here is strong. Despite this, Aliya didn't seem too bothered about being seen. The guards did check both of us out, but none of them did so much as utter a word to us.


I left my friends to set up a room in the local tavern and headed out for a mission of my own. I had to figure out exactly where the Razor would be buried, and who its local owner would be. The temple was already closed and they wouldn't have told me anything anyway, so I had to do all of this stealthily.


There's a great number of burial sites and ancient tombs around this area, some of which are closer than the others. I didn't really know what to look for until I started going over the family names of the tombs. Two out of twelve were a match with a current registry of employers here in this temple. One of them is by the sea down the road we came, while the other one is located on the north-western slopes of Mount Assarnibibi, some twenty kilometers to the north from here.


This one is a total no-brainer; we're gonna search the Raviro Ancestral Tomb first, which is close-by. If that's a miss, we'll trek through mountains towards the tomb of Alas. Hopefully it's a match, as I don't feel like hiking.







Morning Star, 20th, 3E 428

Surprise, surprise, visiting the tomb of Raviro family was a waste of time.


Assarnibibi, the mountain that was visible to us throughout our journey, is also another holy site in the Tribunal temple's lore according to some travel map I found in a general store when we were leaving. Not sure why though, because to me this mountain looks just like any other, except maybe a little bit taller than average, and a lot blacker. We weren't headed for its summit though, so let's talk about the family tomb of Alas.


From the outside it looked just like any other boring burial, but inside, instead of finding undead, we found the once dead owner's familiars still guarding his remains. A pair of Scamps was the least of our problems, with me being able to take them out silently. A damn Clannfear then challenged us, and let me just tell you, as unassuming as they look, they're quick and deadly. I'm ill-suited to deal with them, but Staada taught me to try get behind them and run circles around them, as their bulky heads are invulnerable to damage, while their short legs are awfully slow at turning.


An Ogrim then surprised us from behind, but Staada, being as resourceful and amazing as ever, was able to save her mistress from being grabbed. It took our collective efforts to take it down though. The fire Atronach was left for Aliya to handle, as we didn't really feel like getting burned by getting close to it. A smart sequence of shutting down its magical defenses and a barrage of electricity later, the elemental exploded in a spectacular burst.


I approached the now skeletal remains of the man resting in his coffin and found an old dagger. The scabbard is in pristine shape with the letter "O" in daedric alphabet carved on it, but the blade looks brittle and unusable. It sure is pretty, but is this truly Mehrunes' Razor, a weapon of legend? More importantly, am I supposed to put down a priest with this? I guess that's doable, but it's not exactly sharp. It's gonna be a painful kill I'm sure.


All success so far. Weather is nice and with not a cloud in sight, I bet we're gonna have a fantastic sleep. No bandits around these parts either, just pilgrims and wild animals. Staada will keep watch over the night to make sure nothing happens to us. After that, she'll get some well-deserved time off.







Morning Star, 21st, 3E 428

We made it back to Molag Mar, but instead of settling down to rent a new room, we didn't even make our presence known. We figured out when the next boat would be leaving, and then found a safe passage into the plaza. Even though it was the middle of the day, I snuck into the Temple, because there was no way I was gonna let anyone see me.


After sneaking and searching around for a while, for way longer than I anticipated, I figured out where my target was. I didn't have much time, so I had to be quick. I knew that the ship was gonna leave the port at any moment and I wasn't gonna be late.


Lucky for me, my target was in his own study, writing something, probably work related, didn't care to check. He didn't see me, which allowed me to walk right behind him, so close I could touch him. I wanted to humor him with a chat, but the risk was too great, and I didn't have time either. I simply stabbed his heart as hard as I could. It was a shitty stab with a shitty weapon, and he was capable of still making noise, even though his death was sealed. In haste, I also slit his neck open, or at least tried to.


I could hear someone running towards the room, and the door was open. In panicked haste, and remembered the little toy I had on my finger. Never had I ever used it before, so I simply prayed it would work perfectly as I activated its power and cloaked myself, just in time to step into invisibility and hide from the horrified priestess' view. She was shouting and screaming guards, for help, for anyone. She couldn't believe that master Alas was dead. I could slip past her and start running as fast as I could, but even though I could not be seen, I was obviously making noise. She noticed my transparent visage, and her spell helped her locate my lifeforce and see the marking of my soul through her eyes. Still, no way she could've recognized me. She tried to strike me with an icy spear, which shattered on impact against the clay wall. Imagine an arrow, except ten times thicker, twice as long, and just as quick in air. Like shit, that kind of spear could've killed me! I knew I would be fast enough to escape her, but what if the other priests, mages or even trained guards could use similar style of magic?


Fortunately I made it out from the temple without any additional problems. I could hear the woman shouting orders at her colleagues about the assassin having escaped, trying to get them to secure any possible exits, and to me it seemed clear that she couldn't perceive my presence anymore. By the time the Ordinators were aware of what was going on, I had already slipped past them too.


Just as I had suspected, the ship had raised its anchor and it was leaving. Aliya was already on the board, seeming a little distraught about me not making it in time, wondering if she should abandon the ship. She didn't have to, because I simply tapped on her shoulder, asking if she paid for me. She nodded and hugged me, asking if I got into trouble.


Well, yes, I got into trouble, but it'll be fine… I hope…


This is an Imperial trade ship on route to Castle Ebonheart. That's a bummer, as we were supposed to go straight to Sadrith Mora, but it'll do. I'll just visit Ald Sotha, because isn't that a shrine to Mehrunes Dagon too? Would I be able to restore the Razor there? I sure hope so. I don't want to keep carrying a bloody, rusty dagger around. Even though it's in its scabbard, you can still smell the blood through it.







Morning Star, 22nd, 3E 428

I approached the shrine of Dagon to communicate. His godly magic touched the rusty, bloody dagger on the altar, and sure enough, he could restore the shining edge of this daedric weapon to its pristine glory. For a weapon made from daedric metal it sure looks… Different. It's grey and silvery, although still darker than your typical silver or steel weapon. Deadlier too, for sure. It's my first properly enchanted weapon too, and it's got something to do with disintegrating both flesh and armor with poison. So shiny too, I can see my reflection on it. And its shape, it's such a beautiful weapon.


Mehrunes Dagon said that he trusts me with carrying it and wreaking havoc on mortals with it, and that was the end of it… Or, at least the end of me talking to him.


Severa seemed simultaneously angered and impressed of me wielding this weapon, a blade that she recognized instantly. She asked what in Sithis' name was going on here, and I explained everything that happened to me in Yassamidan, trying to make it clear that it was never my intention to hide anything from her. She nodded, saying that she's obviously happy and proud, but also a bit mad about me not consulting about murdering a priest first. Then, she told me to listen carefully to what she was about to say next.


"Don't rely on it too much", she said. "Every soul this Razor takes is sent straight to the Lord of Destruction himself. That is not what we want, that is not our way."


I admit, I didn't know that. It doesn't really matter to me what happens to the soul after they die. Void or the Deadlands, I'm not sure what kind of afterlife is worse. It could also just be that sending souls to the void is just a metaphor and that the Dark Brotherhood actually doesn't have control over where our target's screaming souls go in afterlife… But I'll keep that opinion to myself. I'm not too keen on angering my colleagues with my blasphemy, and I don't really want to invoke the wrath of Sithis either.


"Secondly, keep it out of view", she said, looking over her shoulder to make sure we were still alone. "I'm sure they are looking for the Razor too."


After that, I left. There's no more real work available for me, at least not here. There could be on the east coast, and I kind of need to help Aliya there too.


On a final note, was recovering this artifact truly a smart idea? Mehrunes Dagon entrusted it with me, but he could be plotting something himself, and who knows how long he will want me to wield it. If I were to act like he told me, I would surely please him by giving him a lot of souls to play with, but if I were to seldom use it as Severa instructed, then I might displease him. And, like Severa said, there are many who want this weapon too, many who probably deem me unworthy, such as the rivaling Dagonists. Whether it's the local ones or the Mythic Dawn, they would surely come for me if they found out I wielded the Razor.


I have an ugly feeling in my stomach, but for now, I'll hold onto it. I have another great dagger too, so it's not like I need it. Granted, this one's enchanted and better in almost every single way… I'll use it only if I really feel like I need to. Gonna hide the scabbard under armor and conceal it. Would a cape suit me? A black cloak would be neat and work well with my stealthy approach and blend well with my armor… Yeah, I'm gonna get myself one!







Morning Star, 24th 3E 428

Finally, Sadrith Mora! Don't have to worry too much about whether I'm able to get around or not, because Aliya is recognized and welcomed here as a brethren. The place we weren't headed for wasn't in the Telvanni city to the north, but rather in the Wolverine Hall to the south.


Neither of us have met Big Helende yet, but she was quick to believe us to be part of the Thieves Guild, especially after Aliya told her that Habasi recommended us. She said that there's a lot of money to be made in a city this rich, meaning that she also has a LOT of contracts waiting for anyone brave enough to try. She gave us a list of three difficult to acquire items, which include a recipe for specific kind of dispel potion, some cookbook which belongs to a Redoran master chef, as well as a high-quality retort used for alchemy. "A good starting point for me to test your skills", she said.


I see a pattern here. Could it be that mages and thieves work together here in this city, where they both are seen as outsiders by the mighty Telvanni? Aliya says she's not too keen on angering the wrong people though, which I can respect considering she's trying to advance ranks here.


Anyway, stealing the potion recipe was the easiest part, as we didn't have to actually leave the city for that. Anis Seloth's shop has no special name, as she operates a business from her house, but that doesn't make her business any less reputable. I actually didn't steal the recipe, but instead just copied it on a paper. To prove to Helende that it was a real deal and that I wasn't scamming her, she let me us a laboratory in the tavern to brew the potion according to the recipe. That's one out of three down.


Next job requires us to travel north to Tel Mora, but we're taking the scenic route. Aliya has some places to visit down the road. I think we're gonna start off to the south-west of here and visit a camp of Erabenimsun tribe. I have no idea what kind of test they will put Aliya through and I don't even know if I can help her in this quest. Even if I can't… At least I'll give her some emotional support!







Morning Star, 29th 3E 428

Out of the four great clans of Vvardenfell, Erabenimsun is by far least accepting of outlanders, and the fact that they're not prominent followers of the Nerevarine cult complicated the situation even more. Even with the proof around Aliya's finger, there were those amongst these Ashlanders who saw her as nothing more than a fake and a fraud.


I kept quiet with Staada on my side, as Aliya was asking the questions. Two first people she approached told her that she's not welcome and that she won't be accepted, telling her to go spout her superstitious nonsense elsewhere, but the third one gave a different answer. He too said that she won't ever be accepted, but only if the situation remains as it is. Aliya was quickly granted audit with the wise woman of Erabenimsun, Manirai, who was more than happy to hear her out and explain what's going on.


Manirai went on to talk about the two faces of Erabenimsun. One which she represents is one that is peaceful, where people act wary but are ultimately friendly towards outsiders, and above everything else, respectful of the world around them, as well as the ancestors who paved the way that the modern tribe walks today. One that the Ashkhan Ulath-Pal represents though is very warlike, violent and hateful towards outsiders and anyone who allies with them, even the other Ashlander tribes. He along with his supporters, most of his Gulakhans, have pushed this way of life ever since taking power following the death of former Ashkhan Airan-Ammu. I kept my mouth shut here as well, but I have to wonder, could some of the Ashlanders I've been contracted to murder in this general area been connected to this tribe as well? Wouldn't surprise me.


Manirai hates what this tribe has become, but believes it's not the past the point of no return. "It can be reformed", she said. She herself is getting old, and even though she's very much respected, in the current political climate she has little to no influence over this tribe. She also said she's almost certain that peaceful reformation of the tribe is simply not possibly. "What we need is a violent revolution", she said, "it's the only way". Ulath-Pal and his Gulakhans Ahaz, Ranabi and Ashu-Ahhe must die. Only if Aliya could pull this off, could she be named the Nerevarine of Erabenimsun.


Aliya is no killer, which makes this all the more complicated, as me doing all the job in her stead wouldn't prove her to the tribe. She seemed troubled, but promised that she'd do whatever she could for the betterment of this tribe.


This is where things started going against us. Two of our targets were waiting for us outside with four of his men at bay. Walls of these yurts are thin, and they had been listening on that discussion. They made it clear that the wise woman's betrayal would not be tolerated, and that they weren't gonna take any risks or make any deals with us. They wanted us captured alive, and that's exactly what they were going to try.


They gained an early upper hand but the fact that they weren't actually trying to kill us three cost them, as we took three of these common bandits down in self-defense. By that time though, everyone had realized what was going on, including the Ashkhan himself. They managed to wound Staada, which was a big shock to me considering that she's by far the best close-quarters fighter among us. Aliya was faring badly and I knew I wasn't gonna last long either. It was actually one of the Gulakhans Ranabi who finally caught me, but he couldn't overpower me in time. In my resistance and attempt to free myself I managed to strike through his magical barrier to strike a mortal blow to his neck and shoulder, but that would end up being the last thing I managed to do, because the men pinned me to the ground. I saw them try to keep Aliya down, but it was actually Manirai who managed to save her from being captured. I shouted at Aliya to just forget about trying to fight and run away, and it's a good thing she did.


Ulath-Pal was smiling having forced his opposition into submission, but under that wicked grin I could tell that he was seething with rage because one of his Gulakhans was dead along with three of his other men. One of his men tied my hands tightly behind my back and grabbed me by my hair, pulling it backwards to expose my face to the angry man. He slapped me square on my cheek and the stinging pain of his palm immediately forced my eyes to water up. He swore at me, hurled abuse at me, called me a fucking monkey and likened my skin-color to that of his shit. He called me an animal only fit for rape and said he's gonna make me regret stepping onto this island and ever siding myself with the false incarnate. All this made me want to kill him, and I begun to understand exactly why Manirai was calling for a violent revolution. Despite my anger though, there was nothing I could do to stop him from abusing me.


Me and Staada were dragged inside Ulath-Pal's yurt and found out what it had outside wasn't all the place had to offer, as there was an underground passage leading to an egg mine. Ulath-Pal had quite a few slaves down there as free labor for him. Our job down here is to serve our masters through not through labor, but through sexual servitude.


Also, let me just say that these guys are nowhere near as dumb and careless as those bandits in that abandoned stronghold were.


Current entry still unfinished.


End of current content.