JoS/Kanna/17th Journal - An Epic Quest to Slay a Dragon and Save a Princess

Sun's Dawn, 10th, 3E 428

(By Kanna)

Accompanied by Assamma-Idan on his boat, we navigated the Dreugh-infested shallow waters toward our destination, the ancient ruins of Ald Daedroth. Approaching the island, however, we realized we weren't the only visitors present and spotted a medium-sized warship donning the banner of the Tribunal Temple on the far-southern rocky shores of the island. Assamma-Idan steered his boat starboard towards the eastern shores to safely hide it, but we couldn't agree on how to proceed next.

Surveying the situation from a safe vantage point, we couldn't really make sense of it all. There were signs of a battle already fought near the shrine, but what was gonna happen next? Like, were they going to assault the shrine again, or were they retreating? The only clear thing was that they hadn't made much progress.

Aliya and Staada were mostly arguing over whether or not we should attack - which, might I add, manages to make me giggle even though they get so damn annoyed with each other sometimes - but I had a better and more open plan. I wanted to attempt diplomacy, but I had to do it alone. Couldn't afford to have Aliya be recognized by them, as unlikely as it may have been.

So, I approached the ship in plain view with my hands in the air to signal I wasn't a threat, a move that seemed to work as far as not being attacked on sight goes! For a moment, it almost looked like I would be, with two Ordinators moving toward me with their weapons drawn, but luckily, an old Dunmeri man standing on the ship's deck in a lavish robe reeled his subordinates back. "Stop immediately, and let her pass", he ordered with a booming voice, and after putting their weapons away, the Ordinators let me approach the old Templar, who now walked the ramp down from the ship.

"I didn't expect diplomacy from a bunch of madmen", the old man commented. He must've thought I was one of the worshippers. I mean, I wouldn't strictly consider myself HIS worshipper, but HE seems to think highly of me, or else he wouldn't even converse with me. Or maybe he's just amused by me, which kinda sounds troubling too. I'm not a crazy person, am I? Okay, I am, but come on, I'm not THAT crazy!

Anyway, my gut told me to just be honest and to mention why we were there in the first place. I explained how we - yes, WE - were on the island on behalf of Ahemmusa, looking for a safe place for them to stay in. Based on all the questions this old man had for me regarding our motivations, he didn't like what he was hearing. The following is a recollection of our little discussion.

"Do you seriously want me to believe that you just happened to stop here on this remote island while helping those Ashlanders?"

"I… we didn't just "happen" here, as they actually sent us here in specific", I replied. "This is supposedly a sacred ground to them or something, but they can't come here while Sheogorath's worshippers are here…"

The old man's eyebrows rose with surprise, and his face softened, suggesting my explanation was adequate, but he still wasn't completely sold. "And who is this "we" you talk of?" he asked, eyeing me down from head to toe, and turning his head around to see if anyone else was nearby. "I find it difficult to believe that those vagabonds would hire an outlander to work for them, especially someone as young as yourself."

"I-it's just a couple of my friends and me", I said, wondering how many details I should even reveal. "We're freelance adventurers, and they're really desperate for help, you know…"

"I'm not sure if I like the sound of those Daedra-worshipping heretics coming here either", he said, with an apparent disgust in his voice. "Who knows what they're up to", he then muttered under his breath.

"They're simply looking for a safe refuge", I explained, trying to put on a sympathetic voice. "Their tribe is really suffering."

"And who in their right mind would even let their daughter become an adventurer at such a young age", he then commented, sounding almost as if the comment wasn't directed at me, but rather at someone else.

"As an orphan, I don't really have much choice but to look out for myself", I said, smiling to hide my annoyance toward him. It's like he was looking me down his nose, which rubbed me the wrong way, especially since he was making such bold assumptions without knowing anything about me. "I'm not as useless as I may look, you know."

"I see", he then said, nodding understandingly.

"I hate to ask", I said, deciding to switch the topic, "but why are you here in this remote place then?"

He huffed in an almost comically exaggerated manner. "Why else, but to impose the Tribunal's rule and rid this island of heretical scum."

"Is that really all?" I pressed.

That question shut him up, and his brow wrinkled. "That's all you need to know", he said. "This matter only concerns the Tribunal Temple."

"I mean, what's the harm?" I asked as I continued to wear my bright smile. "Our interests align, as we both want the worshippers gone. Maybe we could help each other?"

"I'm not sure if we strictly speaking need help in killing them…" he mumbled, which made me a little anxious. After all, assisting them in "killing" the worshippers was the last thing on my mind when I mentioned help, but I decided to keep my mouth shut. Good thing I did. "Archcanon Saryoni has tasked us with honoring Lord Vivec's age-old pact with Sheogorath and restoring this shrine's rightful status as a holy site of pilgrimage, but his worshippers are interfering with our work. There's this… ugh, let's just call it a "ceremonial articact" meant to be used as an offering for Sheogorath to lessen his influence over the Dunmeri people, but these damn lunatics are keeping it from us, thus preventing us from renewing the pact as agreed upon by the terms laid in Coldharbour Compact."

I'm paraphrasing, but it went something like that. Regardless, smelling an opportunity to resolve this all peacefully and without bloodshed, I made a suggestion to the robed old man. "Maybe I could deal with them? I mean, I was meant to come here to have a talk with the worshippers on Ahemmusa's behalf to begin with, and kinda come to some sort of agreement, and didn't even expect to see you gentlemen here, so…"

He scoffed to interrupt me, obviously not expecting me to succeed in coming to any kind of agreement with those so-called lunatics. "You're free to try, but our business isn't done here", he said, instructing the Ordinators to come with him as he walked the ramp back on the ship. I guess they were retreating, huh? "Be on your merry way then, little one", he continued. "Whether you fail or succeed, we'll be back to finish our job here posthaste. Keep that in mind before you get yourself killed for nothing, outlander."

This left me a little confused. "Ummm, how about the Ahemmusa? Can they come here?"

For a second, it seemed like he was about to say "no" right away, but he actually hesitated. Smirking at me from the ship, he then replied: "We'll see about that after you do your part in ridding this shrine of scum. That is, IF you manage." Then, proceeding to ignore me, he began instructing his subordinates. "We've seen enough here. Set sail for Vivec."

It really doesn't seem like the Temple is willing to solve this "problem" by peaceful means, but for what it's worth, I felt like they could be reasoned with! Like, I have no idea what kind of beef the Temple and the Ashlanders have with each other - probably religious differences - but the situation isn't hopeless as far as convincing the Temple to let them stay here goes.

So, I returned to Aliya and Staada and explained the situation. Neither of them liked what they were hearing, but sadly, this is what we have to deal with. Besides, even with the Temple in the mix, our mission hadn't changed. We still had the unenviable task of convincing these guys to leave, and that's what we got on with immediately.

We walked up the hill and into the outer ruins searching for an entrance, and that's when two male Orcs and two adult women - a Breton and a Dark Elf - ambushed us, but recognizing Staada for an Aureal, they immediately halted their attack. One of the Orcs then spoke, profusely apologizing for having mistaken me for a "gold-hat", having seen me talk to them, and after a bit of friendly chatter, we introduced ourselves to each other. His name was Fore Paw, and he introduced himself as the bouncer for the "Mad God's Masque and Bellicose Ball". In other words, they were having a party.

Most of the "festivities" were held in the Antechamber, as became apparent to us when Fore Paw escorted us upstairs to the "Ball Room", saying there was lots of fun to be had. To paraphrase, they had free drinks and lots of cheese, fantastic tunes to dance to, and plenty of guests to mingle and make love with. I'm not gonna lie, this all reminded us of that time we met Staada, when she had been sent to have an orgy in that hermit's backyard. Sheogorath seems to love messing with mortals and polite society by ordering his followers to just be merry and have fun!

Even though most of the guests were already drunk, we didn't come across a lot of music or love-making, as the "party" was only starting to recommence after being so rudely interrupted by the "gold-hats". We did come across other strange sights and people though. Firstly, there was a talking Scamp there. Yeah, seriously, the bugger could speak! I think his name was Lustidrike, and he seemed super friendly, giving everyone free drinks. I got a taste of his Sujamma, which was so strong I couldn't help but look a little disgusted. It was like I was drinking fire! It burned so much! Aliya and Staada laughed at me when I tried it, calling me a baby for being unable to handle it, which kinda made me giggle too. Besides, it's always refreshing to see those two actually agree with something and laugh together.

The other strange person I want to mention was an Orc who thought he was actually a Khajiit. He must've just been joking around because he was literally fucking "meowing", but then again, who even knows when you're dealing with Sheogorath's worshippers? They're all fucked-up in the head.

I personally would've loved to stay and meet even more people, but Aliya and I both knew that time was of the essence. Not only do we need these guys gone to appease the Ahemmusa, but we also need to convince them to leave so they won't get hurt in the Tribunal's next raid. This time, Aliya wanted to do the talking.

"Look, I'd love to mingle", she said, appearing visibly nervous and uncomfortable with the situation, especially with that crazy, tall Orc purring at her while clearly staring at her ass. "But I'm looking for someone. Is there anyone called Hlireni here?"

"Who's asking?" Fore Paw shot back.

"Name's Aliya, sir, and I… ummm, I'm here on behalf of Ahemmusa because they're looking for a safe refuge, and - "

"Well, they're welcome to join the party too", Fore Paw happily said.

Aliya grew even more restless with her nervousness but tried to at least act cool and even laughed a little. "Yeah, I mean… hahaha, I think they're a little shy... because they want you gone for whatever reason, or something…"

"Sounds to me like they're prude, not shy!" Fore Paw shouted and let out a boisterous bit of laughter. "Oh, but we can't leave. Oh, no, no, not until the princess returns."

Aliya tilted her head in confusion. "Princess?"

"What? You just asked to meet her a second ago, didn't you?"

"I... guess?" Aliya said, and based on how she looked, I guess the teeny little Altmer cogs were beginning to turn in her head as she realized - just like I realized - that the princess Fore Paw talks about is, in fact, Hlireni. "So, when is she going to return?"

Fore Paw shook his head. "I don't know. She was sent on a quest by Uncle Sheo to retrieve the Gambolpuddy from the dragon's lair, but she hasn't returned. I think something might've happened to her."

"So, where is this, ermmm... dragon's lair?"

"She didn't tell us."

"…And nobody has gone looking for her?"

"Oh no, princess told us that we need to wait. Uncle Sheo says we can't leave either, not before the princess returns with the offering."

That's when I had to speak up. "Wait, what offering?"

Fore Paw turned towards me, staring at me like I had three heads. "Have you not been paying attention?" he asked, sounding offended. "Gam-bol-puddy. Uncle Sheo wants us to give it to the gold-hats, so they'll leave us alone."

Now, this was starting to sound familiar, and I realized that this is the so-called ceremonial artifact that Templar spoke of, but at the same time, this left me confused. "I thought you guys were trying to keep it from them…?"

Fore Paw let out a loud and rowdy guffaw. "Oh, no, no! They just think we're keeping it from them on purpose since princess hasn't recovered it yet!"

Figures. Still, this simplifies the task at hand, and I think I know what we must do. After a warm giggle, I told him: "Sounds like I'll have to go find Hlir- …I mean, your princess then!"

And that was that. We decided to leave and get to work, but since neither Aliya nor Staada had figured out what my plan was, I had to explain my line of thinking to them. See, all of this sounded familiar to me from my own encounter with Sheogorath. Princess, a dragon's lair… this has something to do with the quest he gave me! She's on that island Big Head lives on, and since I have that place marked on my map, I know exactly where we're headed! Still, I was given this mission like, what, a little over three weeks ago? Has this stalemate been going on here for that long, or was this all foresight on the Mad God's part? I guess it doesn't matter. All I know is that we must succeed in bringing Gambolpuddy back so that the Temple will leave these worshippers alone! That should also ensure that Ahemmusa can come to take refuge here! And since Fore Paw says the Ashlanders are welcome to join the party, we can accomplish this all without any bloodshed! Win-win-win!

Assamma-Idan, being the whiny teenage boy he is, doesn't sound too happy about having to chauffer us across the northern seas for free, but after Aliya and I started teasing him about maybe paying him later with our bodies, he quieted down. Not sure if it's because he's now too embarrassed to even speak with us or because he's actually expecting to get laid, but whatever. I was just teasing him, but if he holds me to that promise, I can just make Staada do it instead!

Anyway, time to set up a tent and catch some fish so we'll have something to eat before we go to sleep. It's been a long day, and tomorrow will likely be equally long!

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