JoS/Kanna/17th Journal - An Epic Quest to Slay a Dragon and Save a Princess

Sun's Dawn, 10th, 3E 428

(By Kanna)

Accompanied by Assamma-Idan on his boat, we navigated the Dreugh-infested shallow waters toward our destination, the ancient ruins of Ald Daedroth. Approaching the island, however, we realized we weren't the only visitors present and spotted a medium-sized warship donning the banner of the Tribunal Temple on the far-southern rocky shores of the island. Assamma-Idan steered his boat starboard towards the eastern shores to safely hide it, but we couldn't agree on how to proceed next.

Surveying the situation from a safe vantage point, we couldn't really make sense of it all. There were signs of a battle already fought near the shrine, but what was gonna happen next? Like, were they going to assault the shrine again, or were they retreating? The only clear thing was that they hadn't made much progress.

Aliya and Staada were mostly arguing over whether or not we should attack - which, might I add, manages to make me giggle even though they get so damn annoyed with each other sometimes - but I had a better and more open plan. I wanted to attempt diplomacy, but I had to do it alone. Couldn't afford to have Aliya be recognized by them, as unlikely as it may have been.

So, I approached the ship in plain view with my hands in the air to signal I wasn't a threat, a move that seemed to work as far as not being attacked on sight goes! For a moment, it almost looked like I would be, with two Ordinators moving toward me with their weapons drawn, but luckily, an old Dunmeri man standing on the ship's deck in a lavish robe reeled his subordinates back. "Stop immediately, and let her pass", he ordered with a booming voice, and after putting their weapons away, the Ordinators let me approach the old Templar, who now walked the ramp down from the ship.

"I didn't expect diplomacy from a bunch of madmen", the old man commented. He must've thought I was one of the worshippers. I mean, I wouldn't strictly consider myself HIS worshipper, but HE seems to think highly of me, or else he wouldn't even converse with me. Or maybe he's just amused by me, which kinda sounds troubling too. I'm not a crazy person, am I? Okay, I am, but come on, I'm not THAT crazy!

Anyway, my gut told me to just be honest and to mention why we were there in the first place. I explained how we - yes, WE - were on the island on behalf of Ahemmusa, looking for a safe place for them to stay in. Based on all the questions this old man had for me regarding our motivations, he didn't like what he was hearing. The following is a recollection of our little discussion.

"Do you seriously want me to believe that you just happened to stop here on this remote island while helping those Ashlanders?"

"I… we didn't just "happen" here, as they actually sent us here in specific", I replied. "This is supposedly a sacred ground to them or something, but they can't come here while Sheogorath's worshippers are here…"

The old man's eyebrows rose with surprise, and his face softened, suggesting my explanation was adequate, but he still wasn't completely sold. "And who is this "we" you talk of?" he asked, eyeing me down from head to toe, and turning his head around to see if anyone else was nearby. "I find it difficult to believe that those vagabonds would hire an outlander to work for them, especially someone as young as yourself."

"I-it's just a couple of my friends and me", I said, wondering how many details I should even reveal. "We're freelance adventurers, and they're really desperate for help, you know…"

"I'm not sure if I like the sound of those Daedra-worshipping heretics coming here either", he said, with an apparent disgust in his voice. "Who knows what they're up to", he then muttered under his breath.

"They're simply looking for a safe refuge", I explained, trying to put on a sympathetic voice. "Their tribe is really suffering."

"And who in their right mind would even let their daughter become an adventurer at such a young age", he then commented, sounding almost as if the comment wasn't directed at me, but rather at someone else.

"As an orphan, I don't really have much choice but to look out for myself", I said, smiling to hide my annoyance toward him. It's like he was looking me down his nose, which rubbed me the wrong way, especially since he was making such bold assumptions without knowing anything about me. "I'm not as useless as I may look, you know."

"I see", he then said, nodding understandingly.

"I hate to ask", I said, deciding to switch the topic, "but why are you here in this remote place then?"

He huffed in an almost comically exaggerated manner. "Why else, but to impose the Tribunal's rule and rid this island of heretical scum."

"Is that really all?" I pressed.

That question shut him up, and his brow wrinkled. "That's all you need to know", he said. "This matter only concerns the Tribunal Temple."

"I mean, what's the harm?" I asked as I continued to wear my bright smile. "Our interests align, as we both want the worshippers gone. Maybe we could help each other?"

"I'm not sure if we strictly speaking need help in killing them…" he mumbled, which made me a little anxious. After all, assisting them in "killing" the worshippers was the last thing on my mind when I mentioned help, but I decided to keep my mouth shut. Good thing I did. "Archcanon Saryoni has tasked us with honoring Lord Vivec's age-old pact with Sheogorath and restoring this shrine's rightful status as a holy site of pilgrimage, but his worshippers are interfering with our work. There's this… ugh, let's just call it a "ceremonial articact" meant to be used as an offering for Sheogorath to lessen his influence over the Dunmeri people, but these damn lunatics are keeping it from us, thus preventing us from renewing the pact as agreed upon by the terms laid in Coldharbour Compact."

I'm paraphrasing, but it went something like that. Regardless, smelling an opportunity to resolve this all peacefully and without bloodshed, I made a suggestion to the robed old man. "Maybe I could deal with them? I mean, I was meant to come here to have a talk with the worshippers on Ahemmusa's behalf to begin with, and kinda come to some sort of agreement, and didn't even expect to see you gentlemen here, so…"

He scoffed to interrupt me, obviously not expecting me to succeed in coming to any kind of agreement with those so-called lunatics. "You're free to try, but our business isn't done here", he said, instructing the Ordinators to come with him as he walked the ramp back on the ship. I guess they were retreating, huh? "Be on your merry way then, little one", he continued. "Whether you fail or succeed, we'll be back to finish our job here posthaste. Keep that in mind before you get yourself killed for nothing, outlander."

This left me a little confused. "Ummm, how about the Ahemmusa? Can they come here?"

For a second, it seemed like he was about to say "no" right away, but he actually hesitated. Smirking at me from the ship, he then replied: "We'll see about that after you do your part in ridding this shrine of scum. That is, IF you manage." Then, proceeding to ignore me, he began instructing his subordinates. "We've seen enough here. Set sail for Vivec."

It really doesn't seem like the Temple is willing to solve this "problem" by peaceful means, but for what it's worth, I felt like they could be reasoned with! Like, I have no idea what kind of beef the Temple and the Ashlanders have with each other - probably religious differences - but the situation isn't hopeless as far as convincing the Temple to let them stay here goes.

So, I returned to Aliya and Staada and explained the situation. Neither of them liked what they were hearing, but sadly, this is what we have to deal with. Besides, even with the Temple in the mix, our mission hadn't changed. We still had the unenviable task of convincing these guys to leave, and that's what we got on with immediately.

We walked up the hill and into the outer ruins searching for an entrance, and that's when two male Orcs and two adult women - a Breton and a Dark Elf - ambushed us, but recognizing Staada for an Aureal, they immediately halted their attack. One of the Orcs then spoke, profusely apologizing for having mistaken me for a "gold-hat", having seen me talk to them, and after a bit of friendly chatter, we introduced ourselves to each other. His name was Fore Paw, and he introduced himself as the bouncer for the "Mad God's Masque and Bellicose Ball". In other words, they were having a party.

Most of the "festivities" were held in the Antechamber, as became apparent to us when Fore Paw escorted us upstairs to the "Ball Room", saying there was lots of fun to be had. To paraphrase, they had free drinks and lots of cheese, fantastic tunes to dance to, and plenty of guests to mingle and make love with. I'm not gonna lie, this all reminded us of that time we met Staada, when she had been sent to have an orgy in that hermit's backyard. Sheogorath seems to love messing with mortals and polite society by ordering his followers to just be merry and have fun!

Even though most of the guests were already drunk, we didn't come across a lot of music or love-making, as the "party" was only starting to recommence after being so rudely interrupted by the "gold-hats". We did come across other strange sights and people though. Firstly, there was a talking Scamp there. Yeah, seriously, the bugger could speak! I think his name was Lustidrike, and he seemed super friendly, giving everyone free drinks. I got a taste of his Sujamma, which was so strong I couldn't help but look a little disgusted. It was like I was drinking fire! It burned so much! Aliya and Staada laughed at me when I tried it, calling me a baby for being unable to handle it, which kinda made me giggle too. Besides, it's always refreshing to see those two actually agree with something and laugh together.

The other strange person I want to mention was an Orc who thought he was actually a Khajiit. He must've just been joking around because he was literally fucking "meowing", but then again, who even knows when you're dealing with Sheogorath's worshippers? They're all fucked-up in the head.

I personally would've loved to stay and meet even more people, but Aliya and I both knew that time was of the essence. Not only do we need these guys gone to appease the Ahemmusa, but we also need to convince them to leave so they won't get hurt in the Tribunal's next raid. This time, Aliya wanted to do the talking.

"Look, I'd love to mingle", she said, appearing visibly nervous and uncomfortable with the situation, especially with that crazy, tall Orc purring at her while clearly staring at her ass. "But I'm looking for someone. Is there anyone called Hlireni here?"

"Who's asking?" Fore Paw shot back.

"Name's Aliya, sir, and I… ummm, I'm here on behalf of Ahemmusa because they're looking for a safe refuge, and - "

"Well, they're welcome to join the party too", Fore Paw happily said.

Aliya grew even more restless with her nervousness but tried to at least act cool and even laughed a little. "Yeah, I mean… hahaha, I think they're a little shy... because they want you gone for whatever reason, or something…"

"Sounds to me like they're prude, not shy!" Fore Paw shouted and let out a boisterous bit of laughter. "Oh, but we can't leave. Oh, no, no, not until the princess returns."

Aliya tilted her head in confusion. "Princess?"

"What? You just asked to meet her a second ago, didn't you?"

"I... guess?" Aliya said, and based on how she looked, I guess the teeny little Altmer cogs were beginning to turn in her head as she realized - just like I realized - that the princess Fore Paw talks about is, in fact, Hlireni. "So, when is she going to return?"

Fore Paw shook his head. "I don't know. She was sent on a quest by Uncle Sheo to retrieve the Gambolpuddy from the dragon's lair, but she hasn't returned. I think something might've happened to her."

"So, where is this, ermmm... dragon's lair?"

"She didn't tell us."

"…And nobody has gone looking for her?"

"Oh no, princess told us that we need to wait. Uncle Sheo says we can't leave either, not before the princess returns with the offering."

That's when I had to speak up. "Wait, what offering?"

Fore Paw turned towards me, staring at me like I had three heads. "Have you not been paying attention?" he asked, sounding offended. "Gam-bol-puddy. Uncle Sheo wants us to give it to the gold-hats, so they'll leave us alone."

Now, this was starting to sound familiar, and I realized that this is the so-called ceremonial artifact that Templar spoke of, but at the same time, this left me confused. "I thought you guys were trying to keep it from them…?"

Fore Paw let out a loud and rowdy guffaw. "Oh, no, no! They just think we're keeping it from them on purpose since princess hasn't recovered it yet!"

Figures. Still, this simplifies the task at hand, and I think I know what we must do. After a warm giggle, I told him: "Sounds like I'll have to go find Hlir- …I mean, your princess then!"

And that was that. We decided to leave and get to work, but since neither Aliya nor Staada had figured out what my plan was, I had to explain my line of thinking to them. See, all of this sounded familiar to me from my own encounter with Sheogorath. Princess, a dragon's lair… this has something to do with the quest he gave me! She's on that island Big Head lives on, and since I have that place marked on my map, I know exactly where we're headed! Still, I was given this mission like, what, a little over three weeks ago? Has this stalemate been going on here for that long, or was this all foresight on the Mad God's part? I guess it doesn't matter. All I know is that we must succeed in bringing Gambolpuddy back so that the Temple will leave these worshippers alone! That should also ensure that Ahemmusa can come to take refuge here! And since Fore Paw says the Ashlanders are welcome to join the party, we can accomplish this all without any bloodshed! Win-win-win!

Assamma-Idan, being the whiny teenage boy he is, doesn't sound too happy about having to chauffer us across the northern seas for free, but after Aliya and I started teasing him about maybe paying him later with our bodies, he quieted down. Not sure if it's because he's now too embarrassed to even speak with us or because he's actually expecting to get laid, but whatever. I was just teasing him, but if he holds me to that promise, I can just make Staada do it instead!

Anyway, time to set up a tent and catch some fish so we'll have something to eat before we go to sleep. It's been a long day, and tomorrow will likely be equally long!

Sun's Dawn, 11th, 3E 428

(By Kanna)

It took us half a day to travel across the Sheogorad Isles, but we made it to our destination. I'm not sure if this island has any actual name, so for the lack of a better one, let's just call it Big Head's island! There's a lot of vegetation here I haven't seen anywhere else in the whole of Morrowind, and the fact that most islands nearby are largely barren makes it stand out amongst the others in this region. Staada explained that it's due to Sheogorath's influence on this island, and that this whole place is meant to resemble the Shivering Isles, the realm of Oblivion he governs.

Big Head's shack was located on top of a hill, surrounded by marshlands, giant mushroom trees, and wild mucksponge plants. The man himself was working on the front lawn, and despite what his name could suggest, this Argonian's head seemed perfectly normal-sized, although I must say, his ears were on the larger side! He welcomed me in warmly, inviting me into his home and saying how he knew I'd be coming, speaking of a vision of a little black girl appearing on his front lawn. The vision spoke nothing of a pale elf, though, so unfortunately, this was as far as Aliya was allowed to accompany me. She just shrugged and said she'd be waiting with Assamma-Idan by the shore, and wished me good luck before leaving.

Once inside with Staada - who was allowed to enter - I immediately asked Big Head about the dragon and the princess, mentioning how he was supposed to be some kind of squire meant to provide me with a weapon, and he confirmed it all to me. However, it got a little confusing.

"Yes, Big Head has the singing fork. Can you hear it?"

My eyes scanned across his messy table, on top of which laid a large assortment of dinnerware, among which were many forks, in fact. "What's this about a fork?" I asked.

"The Fork of Horripilation", he said. "It sings to me. Songs of weeping, songs of leaping. Do you weep, stranger?"

He wasn't making any sense! …Or so I initially thought. As strange as it sounds, one of these forks indeed sang to me. It wasn't like a song or anything, but I could hear the music of magic, and this fork indeed held incredible power.

"Will you take the fork", he asked, "or will the fork take you? Then will you weep?"

As instructed, I took the Fork of Horripilation, the holy dragon-slaying relic, and something unbelievable happened. In a flash of an eye, I felt a spell more powerful than anything I had ever experienced sweep through my body and pulse in my veins. It took all my magicka away from me and even severed my bond with Staada, causing her to disappear into thin air! I instinctively dropped the fork on the floor when I realized this, and fortunately, the damage to my magicka wasn't permanent, but being wholly drained of my powers left me in a state of shock. It was by far the most debilitating and crippling spell that had ever been laid upon me, and I didn't even know what to make of it.

That being said, while its enchantment sure is powerful, let's not kid ourselves into thinking that this is any kind of weapon to be taken seriously. I mean, it's a fork. It's a fucking fork. It's meant to pierce through boiled and steamed vegetables and maybe a fat hunk of meat every now and then, but when I picked it up again, I couldn't even hurt myself with it when I pressed it against my skin lightly. No matter how you look at it, it's literally just a normal fork on the outside.

I pointed this out to Big Head, and asked, "how am I supposed to slay a dragon with this?"

"Point it out, never in. Fork is out, poke poke poke!"

"…Will I even come out of this alive?" I sheepishly asked.

"It's a greedy dragon, but not a hungry dragon. It might feed you and make you sing. Maybe even weep. But it won't eat you."

I wasn't sure what to make of his rambling, but decided it was time to see what I was working with. Sighing, I told him to just take me to the dragon's lair, following him outside with the dumb fork in my hand.

He led me to a little cave at the end of his swampy backyard, and urged caution as he told me to brave the dark depths below. Kinda made me nervous, as this moss and mushroom-covered natural crevice with creepy and slimy tentacle-like roots was rather narrow and barely tall enough for me to walk through without having to bow my head down. No way in Oblivion was it large enough to fit a dragon! Or, maybe it could've been if dragons are actually tiny? I've always imagined them as giant flying fire-breathing lizards, but what do I know? All I know is that the thing in front of me damn sure wasn't a dragon. In fact, even as I'm writing this entry down, I still have no idea what that thing was.

"…What is it?" I asked as I stared down the creepy cluster of tentacles blocking the way deeper into the tunnel, similar to those growing elsewhere in this cave as well.

"Grandpa swamp dragon… lovely fish!"

"It doesn't look like a dragon at all", I pointed out. "Or a fish, for that matter. Maybe an octopus?"

"Yes, songs of feeding, songs of binding", Big Head said, going on another mad tangent. "He has no eyes, but he sees you. He has no nose, but he smells you. He has no tongue, but he tastes you. So go about your business now! The master waits! Fork fork fork. Stabbing meat, lovely meat."

At this point, I thought that maybe this quest wouldn't be so challenging after all. Honestly, it sounded like a boring and tiresome task rather than a difficult one. As I said, it looked like those other tentacle plants I saw growing in the cave, with the only notable difference being that it was growing from the ground, not off the walls. Still, I thought that destroying a plant with a piece of enchanted cutlery should be child's play!

Just to make sure, I asked Big Head to confirm the rules once again: I can't damage the dragon using any weapon other than the fork. That means no blades, fists, claws, or teeth, and certainly no elemental magic. So, with that said, I decided to get on with it! I gave Big Head my daggers for safekeeping and watched as he left the cave, leaving me alone with my quest. I steeled myself for the task at hand, smiling from ear to ear as I supposed I should at least try to have some fun while stabbing away at the tentacles!

With nothing but the magic fork in my hand, I approached the enemy carefully, humming a funny-sounding tune I remember my mother singing to me from time to time. Then, I took aim at the so-called dragon… and just as I was about to strike the first tentacle, it dodged. In fact, all of the tentacles were suddenly moving, and before I could even process what was going on, they were attacking ME! They caught my wrists and neck, slapped the stupid fork off my hand, and as I was trying to pull away with all my might, they dragged me into their midst, with over a dozen tentacles suddenly coiling around my limbs like a bucket full of snakes!

I was honestly panicking. Like, I didn't expect that at all! They were so strong too! I'm not sure if I could've broken free from their grasp even using Restoration magic to enhance my strength! Still, I wasn't afraid for my life - at least not after the initial two to three seconds of panic wore off - as they weren't really trying to kill me, or even hurt me. As forceful as they were, they only held me in place, twisting and turning me around while submitting me to an increasingly tight and firm package.

Then, those things suddenly reached right underneath my armor, Rubbing against my bare chest and even getting right between my buttocks! I gasped audibly, immediately raising my voice to call out to Big Head, saying this wasn't part of the deal, that I didn't sign up to get molested by a damn tentacle creature, but the man was nowhere to be seen. I tried to squirm and wiggle myself out of their clutches, but not only were my attempts futile, it only seemed like it made them have an easier time stripping me. They exposed my chest and pulled down my shorts, completely ripping my panties to shreds and ruining my leather armor by going after the threads and the seams.

I smiled uncomfortably as a pair of tentacles went after my privates, and I almost laughed, even though there was nothing funny about what was going on. I was just so utterly stunned by the situation, and I even said so out loud, saying it must've been a joke and it couldn't seriously be happening, but no matter what, those slimy, squirmy tentacles wouldn't let go of my holes. I gritted my teeth and closed my eyes, sniveling as they forcefully filled me up, going as deep as they could.

I guess that crazy, nasty Argonian was right about at least one thing: that the "dragon" was going to make me weep, and even sing songs of moaning.

Jokes aside, what the fuck was that thing!? A swamp tentacle plant come alive? A mutated Kwama creature, or even a Dreugh? Some kind of lesser Daedra I've never even heard of? Doesn't matter what it was, but it pounded me so hard! Fucked both my ass and pussy at the same time, going at it hard from the get-go! I was the one getting my meat stabbed and poked by its tentacles, and I couldn't believe how hard they were roughing my insides up! I shouted harder, even calling out to Hlireni, but I didn't hear so much as a peep in return! Nobody was going to save me!

Even though they didn't need my own fluids, with all their slime and mucus lubricating me well enough, the pounding also got my body going. I just couldn't help it! It felt so humiliating, but also so stimulating! After just a few minutes, my pussy was already dripping wet - literally - and with all the slime in my intestines, the tentacle in my ass was fucking me faster than any man ever had! I felt overwhelmed, my moans got so loud I practically screamed, and I came. I can't believe I came that hard. I lost all reason and control, both over my willpower and my body. It was honestly incredible.

Despite feeling exhausted, they just kept going at it. I don't know for how long, but it must've been at least an hour, and fuck if I know how many times those tentacles made me cum throughout it all. I didn't have the wherewithal to even bother counting. All I know is that those tentacles never came themselves. All they did was eventually give up, father, and let go of me. Yet, I couldn't even run away. I just crawled out of their reach, lying still, trying to catch my breath and calm my racing heart down.

A few minutes later, I finally dragged myself out of the cave, covered in sweat and mucus, still trying to rationalize what in Oblivion just happened, or more importantly, HOW that could've happened. Oh, but this is fine! Absolutely fine! It only fucked me a while, that's all! Nothing I can't handle! I'm honestly more upset about my armor getting ruined! That was some expensive, top-of-a-shelf leather, you know!

Oh, and I'm seriously supposed to kill it? Using just an enchanted, cursed fork? There's just no way that's ever going to happen! It's just going to rape me again if I try! …Or is it?

Sheogorath didn't send me here on a glorious quest only because I need to "slay" some "dragon". No, there was also something about tapping into debaucherous magic. With everything that's been going on in the past few weeks or so, I kind of forgot about it, but something tells me that the clue to defeating that thing is somewhere along there.

Thinking logically, and according to the most literal interpretation of rules, magic IS allowed on the technicality; I'm just not allowed to damage it using magic. Doesn't leave me with many options, to be honest. Could Illusion work on it? Maybe Alteration? I'm sadly not particularly good at either school, and even if I were, there's the issue of my inability to cast these so-called "debaucherous" spells. All Sheogorath said was that I should be able to use these tricks, but I really don't know any such spells. Staada said this stuff is "self-taught during sex", and that I need to learn these spells my own way, so…

I can't believe I'm even thinking about this, but maybe that's the whole point here? Let myself get fucked by it on purpose, and then use it as means of teaching myself kinky magic? Not sure how because it absolutely dominated me, and casting pretty spells was the last thing on my mind while getting fucked by it. Besides, my lack of concentration isn't even the biggest problem. No, the fact that the dumb fork will drain my magicka and make me unable to cast spells is.

Anyway, this will probably take time, and I'm not expecting to succeed even on my second try, even if I end up trying a completely different approach. Maybe I can figure something out overnight, like find more clues? Big Head seems to have quite a lot of books on his shelves, so maybe there could be some planted there?

Finally, after cleaning myself up and putting on a comfy white one-piece, I notified Assamma-Idan and Aliya that the quest ended up being a lot harder than I thought and that it'd probably take at least a couple of days for me to figure out how to "slay the dragon". Aliya said they'll continue to the port of Khuul thirty nautical miles to the south, from where she'll travel to Gnisis on Telvanni business, while Assamma-Idan just clicked his tongue in frustration. He surprisingly didn't bitch or moan, but it was quite clear that he wasn't too happy about our field trip extending. At least, he can sleep on a comfortable bed now, which Khuul's local tradehouse can offer him.

Now, better get some sleep and hope all my magicka will return while I rest. I'm going to need myself at full power to see if I can come up with new kinds of spells or not.

Sun's Dawn, 12th, 3E 428

(By Kanna)

Hitting the books was a really good idea! Big Head's shelves had the inspiration I was looking for!

I found a curious little book in the "Kinky Daedrologist" series written by "Cosette Bouchard of Wayrest" dedicated to Sheogorath, and decided to give it a read. In case you haven't heard of the author… well, neither had I prior to today, but she became infamous for her book series during the reign of Katariah Septim some two hundred years ago, with her works banned by the Mages Guild for their scandalous contents at the time. At least, that's what the book's preface said. The point is, we're talking about a very rare book indeed, and an even rarer collection of books. Big Head only had installments three and nine, with the other book being about Malacath and the significance of polyamory, and even polysexuality, in the Orsimer culture.

Anyway, I decided to copy some of the texts here as notes for further reading:

For as long as our ancestors have kept written records, sex has been associated with the worship of certain gods and spirits. Be it practitioners of Dibellan Arts, the servants of Molag Bal, the devotees of Mephala, or the followers of Sanguine, examples are plenty, but very few take their intimate acts of worship and adoration as far as the Mazken of Pinnacle Rock and the Aureals of Brellach, Sheogorath's most faithful do.

Known as the guardians of the Shivering Isles and famed for their combat prowess, these Daedra take care of the Madhouse's denizens in the time of peace, all while competing for the Mad God's affection. Not all of this is sexually explicit, of course, but with the high number of sex-crazed maniacs the Isles house inside of them, both amongst the mortals and the ranks of these competing rival societies, sex and nudity are commonplace. Sexual acts performed in the Mad God's name are considered perfectly normal, with nudity being encouraged in some parts of the Isles, even out in the open.

In contrast to the ritualistic and performative Dibellan Arts, or Sanguine's drug-fueled orgies of plenty, Sheogorath's servants use magic to push their partners - especially victims - over the edge, sometimes into mere exhaustion, sometimes into madness, and in rare cases, even deaths. There isn't one school of magic that can be considered to be above one other as far as enhancing a sexual experience goes, but for what it's worth, Restoration, Mysticism, and Destruction spells are most commonly used to manipulate the energies that flow through all sentient and living creatures. Meanwhile, Illusion spells are considered taboo, as they're seen as disruptive to the purity of mind.

The book didn't go into detail about any specific spells, but that sure gives me some ideas! Won't go into detail here, though!

Still, it's a little funny that the book doesn't mention Conjuration, when Staada specifically cited it as her main inspiration for lewd magic. Maybe that's simply because it's what she's good at? I mean, she's technically naked all the time, with her weapons and bikini armor being all bound to her by magic, and she can control lesser daedra to an extent too, so it shouldn't be too surprising, but it was meant as a recommendation for me. She could've at least mentioned Restoration too! After all, I'm arguably just as good at it as I am with Conjuration!

Anyway, time to train! No touching the forky today! No matter how kindly it sings to me to pick it up, I won't so much as pinch it!

I hope my plan will work…

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