Talk:Disastrous Wishes

I really liked the way you introduced the magic coin, though I was worried for her. Being unconscious for two hours after a hit in the head can have serious repercussions. And wow, that coin really has no regard for it's user safety. I think this is the first time I read that during a transformation of the sort the clothes actually are strong enough to harm the wearer.

You did a very good job with the characters, both have lots of personality and react in a believable way when trust into this supernatural accident. Also, several of Serenity's lines and actions had me laugh, which is always good.

Even though they had the switched bodies as proof, I did feel the way Maya assumed the coin was responsible, and the speed at which Serenity accepted this (not even reaching her house), happened a bit too fast. I would have expected some kind of reluctance to accept a supernatural explanation, even in face of the facts (we humans are very good at that).

I must confess the ending baffle me a little. I really didn't imagined the coin making her a hermaphrodite and clone factory; though, in retrospect, it makes sense that the coin would not do something nice. For some reason I expected the story to end with then fucking and then getting their bodies back, so kudos for shattering expectations.

Another thing that's unclear is what is this "amazingly sordid as it was illegal" career they now have. At first I thought it had something to do with the coin, but you never explained; then I thought it would have to do with the clones, but again no answer came.

All in all I really liked this story, short, to the point, yet full of interesting characters and attention to the plot. Thanks for deciding to share it with us.

--Tod Naturlich (talk) 05:47, 5 December 2017 (CET)