Difference between revisions of "Life Hacks/Consent minimums"

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Body shame levels determine how many times a sex act needs to be done with a person in order to be considered "aclimated" or "groomed." These are as follows. (Note, kissing only counts once toward mild sex acts.)
Body shame levels determine how many times a sex act needs to be done with a person in order to be considered "aclimated" or "groomed." These are as follows. (Note, kissing only counts once toward mild sex acts.)


*'''20%:''' Groomed = 3 occurrences, aclimated = 1 occurrence (counts intensities by 20 point increments)
*'''10%:''' Groomed = 3 occurrences, aclimated = 1 occurrence (counts intensities by 40 point increments)^


*'''40%:''' Groomed = 6 occurrences, aclimated = 2 occurrences (counts intensities by 20 point increments)
*'''30%:''' Groomed = 6 occurrences, aclimated = 2 occurrences (counts intensities by 20 point increments)


*'''60%:''' Groomed = 9 occurrences, aclimated = 3 occurrences (counts intensities by 10 point increments)
*'''50%:''' Groomed = 9 occurrences, aclimated = 3 occurrences (counts intensities by 20 point increments)


*'''80%:''' Groomed = 12 occurrences, aclimated = 4 occurrences (counts intensities by 10 point increments)
*'''70%:''' Groomed = 12 occurrences, aclimated = 4 occurrences (counts intensities by 10 point increments)


*'''100%:''' Groomed = 15 occurrences, aclimated = 5 occurrences (counts intensities by 5 point increments)
*'''90%:''' Groomed = 15 occurrences, aclimated = 5 occurrences (counts intensities by 5 point increments)
 
^Note: Intensities counted by 40 point increments means benign and dismissable sex acts are regarded as the same category, as are mild and moderate sex acts.


There are some things that can cap potential body shame levels at a level below 100% even after age 8. These are as follows.
There are some things that can cap potential body shame levels at a level below 100% even after age 8. These are as follows.

Revision as of 12:59, 19 October 2016

Unless the individual is a sexual deviant who likes sex with people they don't know, these numbers are the minimum necessary for the individual in question to give 100% consent to a particular sex act or gesture of affection. As noted before, sex and romance are not associated in a child's mind. The numbers given here are the applicable value, not the romance value.

Determining the applicable value

There is a 3 tier priority system as to what attribute is used to determine whether or not a sex act can be performed with an individual without them resisting. They are as follows.

Submissiveness and grooming

The effects of submissiveness are limited to whether or not the partner is groomed to accept the sex act. If grooming is skipped, their resistance to sexual advances via the submission route will not be the same. It will require +20 the listed values for each grooming level that has not been achieved before reaching this intensity. (so mild sex acts have scores in the 80-100 range if the two grooming levels for benign and dismissable sex acts are skipped.) If they are "aclimated," the short and incomplete version of grooming, it is +10 instead of +20 for a level they have been aclimated to.

Note: Having a sex partner submit to a sex act is not the same as them giving consent. Submission and consent look more or less the same from the outside, but inside someone who submitted but did not consent will very much dislike that they are having this sex act performed on them. This does not necessarily mean a negative impact will result, but it is possible depending on the factors involved.

Fear can substitute for submission if fear meets the required level but submissiveness does not. In this case, the grooming method is not required but the partner that is made to submit through fear never considers it a consensual act regardless of whether or not any other score fits the requirements. This will always lower friendliness/raise enemy values, and may have other negative consequences. (being made to submit through fear will raise submissiveness levels.)

Partner is 14 or younger

Actually, it is somewhere between 13 and 16 that these methods change over, but the hard mid-line will be called at 14 for the sake of simplicity. A child does not connect sex an romance. To a child, romance means fairy tale wedding, being happy together, calling each other by affectionate names, and having children. Having children is not connected to sex for them either, but if they are aware that is how babies are made then a romance level of 10 is all that is needed to convince them to have vaginal intercourse so long as the other required scores are met.

Children under 14 use trust and friendship as their determining scores for whether or not they will permit a sex act, and trust is the more dominant of these two factors. Friendship must be at least 1/2 the value in question, and trust must meet or exceed the value. Also, children with a body shame level of 50% or greater must be aclimatized or groomed before they will accept a moderate or hard-core sex act easily. (1st and 2nd levels of grooming can be skipped.) Without grooming or aclimation, values for moderate sex acts will be increased by 20 and hard-core sex acts by 40.

If the child's trust level is lower than that required, there is a 5 point wiggle room for every 10 points of submissiveness they have with you. They can be pressured into this sex act if they are within the wiggle room afforded by their submission. They will regard it as a consensual act, but they will also feel they were put upon to do something they didn't want to.

Note: If familial love meets or exceeds the value for the sex act, the required trust value is reduced by the difference. Familial love does not substitute for trust, but it does make it significantly easier.

Partner is 15 or older

This is the standard method of acquiring consent. This method applies if none of the above 2 factors are present.

For someone who is 15 or older, there are some blurred lines between love and lust. The only real effective difference between the two for whether or not they will submit to a sex act though is how they will behave in the middle of the sex act. The romantic love score is the only factor measured in determining whether or not consent is achieved, and there is a little bit of wiggle room unlike with the above two categories. The partner will not be comfortable with a sex act unless they meet the required score, but if romance is being used as the measure then it can be as much as 10 points below and they will still consent.

Benign sex acts

Activities that can easily be construed as non-sexual and dismissed both by the person the act is being performed on and also by any on-lookers. It only counts as a sex act because the person performing it gets aroused by it.

Note: Platonic or familial love scores can be substituted for romantic love scores in this category.

  • Hold their hand:(5)
  • Play with their hair:(8)
  • Hugging (8)
  • Pick them up off the ground:(10)
  • Have them sit in your lap:(12)
  • Hold possessively(12)
  • Kiss cheeks or forehead:(15)
  • Kiss their hand(20)

Dismissable sex acts

Activities that can just as easily be taken as sexual or non-sexual. If the person this act is being performed on takes it as non-sexual, it is regarded as 10 points lower than what is listed and familial love can be substituted for romantic love. (familal love by itself does not act as a substitute if they interpret the act as sexual)

  • Be shirtless around them:(20)
  • See them in their pajamas:(20)
  • Oggle their clothed groin or breasts:(25)
  • Press into breasts while hugging:(25)
  • Convince a male to go shirtless around you:(25)
  • Fondle fully clothed ass while hugging or other such activity:(30)
  • Change cloths in presence of each other, not going naked (30)
  • Make sexually charged or sexually related banter with each other(30)
  • Wear only shirt and underwear around them(35)
  • Convince a pre-pubescent girl to go shirtless around you(35)
  • Fondle girl's ass under her skirt(40)
  • "Secretly" dry-hump leg, hip, or ass (either direction)(40)
  • Same gender change clothes while exposing bare genitals in presence of each other (must be regarded as non-sexual): (45/20)* (Note: Score differs depending on whether or not there is an existing romance score. 20 if romance score is zero, 45 if there is an existing romance score, 35 if there is a romance score but the act is regarded as non-sexual.)
  • Opposite gender change cloths while exposing bare genitals in presence of each other (must be regarded as non-sexual):(50)* (40 after it is regarded as non-sexual.)

Mild sex acts

Acts that most would consider inappropriate unless you are in a romantic relationship, but most would not actually consider to be "sex." No other score may be substituted for romantic love except via the submission method.

  • Kiss on lips (30) (Note: Can be regarded as non-sexual in some families and have platonic love points substitute if raised in this way.)
  • French Kiss (40)
  • Grope breasts and/or genitals (50)
  • Change cloths, including underwear, in the same space as each other (50)
  • Use toilet with other present in bathroom(55)
  • Reference or discuss moderate or hard-core sex with each other(55)
  • Sexting (60)
  • Crotch to crotch clothed dry-humping(60)
  • Show privates to each other for no reason other than to just look(60)
  • Be casually naked with one another(60)

Moderate sex acts

Sex acts that most would consider sex, but would not get the "hard-core" label if filmed and put on a porn site.

  • Touch each other's bare genitals with hand(65)
  • Masturbate partner to orgasm(67)
  • Ejaculate on partner's body, not near an orifice(70)
  • Receive oral sex(70)
  • Rub bare genitals together(75)
  • Give oral sex(80)
  • Ejaculate on female partner's vulva(80)* Will not consent if worried about and avoiding pregnancy

Hard-core sex acts

Sex acts that involve semen and/or the penis going into a vagina or anus

  • All homosexual sex(80)
  • Pushing semen from elsewhere into vagina with fingers(80)* Will not consent if worried about and avoiding pregnancy
  • Vaginal sex with condom(85)
  • Ejaculate into spread open vagina, no insertion(85)* Will not consent if worried about and avoiding pregnancy
  • Bare-back vaginal sex, promising to pull out(90)
  • Bare-back vaginal sex, finishing inside(95)* Will not consent if worried about and avoiding pregnancy
  • Fetish or taboo sex that does not align with partner's interests(100)* Also requires that the partner be submissive or persuadable with a reasoned argument or appeal.

Sexual knowledge modifiers

A child who lacks in sexual knowledge will not have quite as strong a taboo against certain things, so depending on on the score it may be easier to get them to do certain things. The list above assumes complete sexual knowledge and all the natural social defenses that make a person resist sexual activity. Therefore, all the items listed here are things that subtract from sexual resistance.

Note: This is where the math might get really complicated. % reduction effects come into the game here. Please do not get too bogged down with it all. Again, these are meant as guide-lines, and it really matters more for writers than for readers. Even for a writer though, the recommendation would be to give these a quick once-over and then approximate the scores while you are writing. Being off by a few points is acceptable.

On the note of complicated percentages, a score cannot be reduced below 25% of its standard levels. The one exception to this rule is if body shame levels are below 25%, in witch case the body shame score becomes the new minimum percentage.

Sense of body shame and sexual resistance

A child usually begins to learn body shame at around 18 months, but it must be re-enforced by the parents and peer group to take full effect. The process of learning body shame is gradual, and it is usually age 6-8 that it has really sunk in and reached 100%.

Body shame is the concept that tells a person that it is wrong to show their naked privates to other people, and also that it is wrong to have their privates touched by another person or to touch another person's privates. Usually at this age they do not have a very strong interest in touching another person's privates unless invited to do so.

Body shame levels determine how many times a sex act needs to be done with a person in order to be considered "aclimated" or "groomed." These are as follows. (Note, kissing only counts once toward mild sex acts.)

  • 10%: Groomed = 3 occurrences, aclimated = 1 occurrence (counts intensities by 40 point increments)^
  • 30%: Groomed = 6 occurrences, aclimated = 2 occurrences (counts intensities by 20 point increments)
  • 50%: Groomed = 9 occurrences, aclimated = 3 occurrences (counts intensities by 20 point increments)
  • 70%: Groomed = 12 occurrences, aclimated = 4 occurrences (counts intensities by 10 point increments)
  • 90%: Groomed = 15 occurrences, aclimated = 5 occurrences (counts intensities by 5 point increments)

^Note: Intensities counted by 40 point increments means benign and dismissable sex acts are regarded as the same category, as are mild and moderate sex acts.

There are some things that can cap potential body shame levels at a level below 100% even after age 8. These are as follows. (Note: There are exceptions, but this is the standard that can be predicted.)

  • No strong social reinforcement: Cap = 20%
  • Raised as a Naturist(Nudist): Cap = 80% sexual touching, 5% nudity and exposure
  • Someone engaged in grooming behaviors with them before age 6: Cap = 100% - 20% per level of grooming completed.
  • Casually engages in skimpy dressing or exhibitionist behaviors: Cap = 60%
  • Mother dresses immodestly or behaves is a sexually permiscuous manner: Cap = 80%
  • Age 5: Cap = 80%
  • Age 4: Cap = 60%
  • Age 3: Cap = 40%
  • Age 2: Cap = 20%
  • Age 18 months: Cap = 5%

Knowledge of sexual mechanics

How well a child or teen knows about the basic mechanics of sex. All negative values here apply to the moderate and hard-core sex act categories only.

  • Does not know how babies are made: (-20)

Will perform sexual acts without concern for the consequences if they do not know what the consequences are.

  • Does not know sex makes babies: (-40)

Has learned about sex but does not know this is how babies are made. The resulting curiosity without concern for the consequences makes them a lot more willing to do it.

  • Does not know what the opposite gender's genitals look like: (-10)

Will be less guarded about showing their genitals to or have their genitals touched by the opposite gender if they think the other gender looks the same as them.

  • Has an incorrect concept of how to prevent pregnancy: (-5)

Incorrectly thinks they won't get pregnant or get a girl pregnant, a little less reserved about sex as a result.

Internalization of social-sexual values

Regardless of how well a child may know or not know the mechanics of sex and no matter how much they have been taught to be modest, they have to actually internalize it and take it on as their own values in order for it to really take effect. Otherwise, they only follow these rules if there is an enforcer around.

These negative values only apply for children under 14 (except for the mid-puberty trait,) and only if they think they can avoid detection by an authority figure they feel will have a negative reaction to them doing this.


  • Starting puberty: (-20)

The hormones of puberty lower sexual inhibitions, this effect is more pronounced before the brain learns how to adapt to this effect -20 values from the age at witch puberty starts until age 14.

  • Mid puberty: (-10)

The brain has started to develop a resistance to sex hormones as the brain develops to a level it can better internalize society's views on sex. -10 values from ages 15 to 17.

  • Curious about male genitals (-20)

Wants to see and/or touch the penis and testicles of an unspecific boy. Any boy will do if they feel they will not get in trouble with an authority figure for it. -20 values for sexual contact with boys.

  • Curious about female genitals (-20)

Wants to see and/or touch the vulva and vangina of an unspecific girl. Any girl will do if they feel they will not get in trouble with an authority figure for it. -20 values for sexual contact with girls.

  • Curious about semen (-10)

Wants to see or come into physical contact with semen. It does not matter what boy ejaculated the semen. -10 values for all moderate sex acts.

  • Curious about penis insertion (-10)

Wants to feel what it is like to have a penis in a vagina or anus. Who the penis is attached to or who's vagina or anus it is only matters so much as they do not think the other person will spread the information around that they did this. -10 values for all hard-core sex acts.

  • Curious about digital insertion (-10)

Wants to touch inside a vagina or anus or be touched inside with somebody else's fingers. Who's fingers and who's orifices it is only matters so much as they do not think the other person will spread the information around that they did this. -10 values to groping and mutual masturbation.

  • Curious about sex (-20)

Female, wants to feel what it is like to have semen ejaculated into her vagina. Male, wants to feel what it is like to ejaculate inside a vagina or anus. Must have trust for the boy or girl involved, but standard romantic love levels can be less than half the normal requirement or not even present at all depending on circumstances. -20 values to all hard-core sex acts. (Trait requirements: Must know that semen comes out of the penis. Does not need to know that sex makes babies.)

  • Fantasizes about babies (-10 to -60)

Wants to have a baby. Note: Does not need to know that sex is how babies are made. -10 to -60 values depending on strength of the desire for a baby if they are told this is how babies are made.

  • Curious about impregnation(-40)

Wants to get pregnant/get a girl pregnant. Note, like all other traits on this list, this is simply due to curiosity and not an understanding of the consequences or romantic love for the person they are having the baby with. To them, they are just playing a game. The determining factor on whether or not they will let a boy get them pregnant/agree to get a girl pregnant is more friendliness than romance, although a romance score of at least 10 is still necessary. -40 to vaginal intercourse.

  • Sexually acclimatized (-10/-5)

A child who does not understand the consequences of sex or sexual acts will feel more comfortable with such acts if they have performed these acts in the past and nothing bad has happened as a result. -10 values to any sex act in a category they have performed a sex act from at least 3 times before, and -5 values to the category immediately above it. (Note: Is overwritten by the "Sexually groomed" trait.)

  • Sexually groomed (-20/-10 or -50/-20)

A child who has regularly engaged in a type of sex act without any negative consequences may not see any problem at all with doing it again in the future. Although, sometimes this comfort with the act can be specific to an individual person. For the person who groomed them, -50 for acts of the level they were groomed on and -20 for the next level progression. For people aside from the person who groomed them, -20 for acts they were groomed for and -10 for the next level progression. (Note: Does not stack with "Sexually acclimated." Groomed will replace acclimated once it is achieved.)

  • Sexually violated (passive reaction) (-10,-20,-30)

A child who has had their sexual boundaries crossed against their will may feel they have no right to have sexual boundaries. -10 to all sex acts if they were touched over their cloths. -20 to all sex acts if they were touched on their bare genitals, ejaculated on, or made to touch another person's genitals, or raped once. -30 to all sex acts if they were raped multiple times. These values only apply to the submission method. These modifiers, without therapy, will continue into adulthood for half or full values depending on other factors.

  • Sexually violated (aggressive reaction)(+20, +40, +60)

Another possible reaction of a child who has had their sexual boundaries crossed against their will is to become more resistant to sexual activity. +20 to all sex acts if they were touched over their cloths. +40 to all sex acts if they were touched on their bare genitals, ejaculated on, or made to touch another person's genitals, or raped once. +60 to all sex acts if they were raped multiple times. These values apply to the trust and romance approaches only, values for the submission method are one quarter these levels. These modifiers, without therapy, will continue into adulthood for half or full values depending on other factors.

Taboo modifiers

These modifiers make someone less likely to engage in certain types of sex acts or sex acts with certain partners depending on whether or not they have internalized the taboo. The strength of a taboo can vary from person to person, so any taboo can add anywhere from +5 to +100 to the required score, however what will be listed here is the average score for most people in western society.

All scores will be listed with a positive or a negative number. The negative number denotes how much someone with the taboo defiance trait will instead seek out sex that defies this taboo. This trait tends to create numbers from -5 to -40, in order to get a result greater than -40 that particular form of taboo sex would have to be that person's fetish.

  • Incest: (+60/-20)

Sex with someone closely related by blood, 1st cousin/blood related aunt or uncle or closer.

  • Sex with infant or toddler (+100/+20)

This is so repugnant to most people that taboo defiance only lowers the aversion to it.

  • Child sex, 10 and under (+80/-0)

Sex with a pre-pubescent child.

  • Sex AS a child under 10 (+40/-10)

Children under 10 are discouraged from sex, and they are normally obedient. Most of that may have to do with them not having much of a concept of or interest in sex to start with.

  • Under-age sex, teen 12-15 (+80/-0)

Sex with a younger teen. Used to be more acceptable in culture, but now it is viewed as every bit as bad as sex with a pre-pubescent child.

  • Sex AS a young teen age 12-15 (+20/-40)

Children are always discouraged from having sex young, but with all these new things they are learning about their bodies sometimes it doesn't take completely. This is also a defiant age, so a taboo defiant child will view sex as the ultimate extreme taboo to break.

  • Jail-bait (+50/-40)

Sex with a 16-18 year old. This is actually legal in 80% of the western world, but even the places where it is legal tend to frown on this on a societal level.

  • Sex AS and older teen (+10/-40)

At this age, teens are encouraged to have safe sex rather than not to have sex at all. What avoidance there is has more to do with encouragement to focus on academics and planning their future. Defiant teens will still see sex as THE taboo to break.

  • Age difference (+40/-30)

The rule is half the older partner's age +7. If the younger partner falls below that age, it is looked down upon even if it is legal. (functions both directions, regardless of age of younger partner.)

  • Race mixing (+20/-20)

This is not so much a taboo, more a result of the biological drive to mate within your social group. Of course, this does create something of an implicitly learned taboo by virtue of the fact it is something people don't do often, even if there is no social enforcement.

  • Race mixing with out group (+40/-40)

Sex with a member of an ethnicity that is currently seen as an active threat to the well-being of the in-group society.

  • Convicted Criminal (+40/-40)

Sex with someone who has committed a crime.

  • Bestiality with dog (+100/-40)

Sex with a dog.

  • Bestiality with farm animal (+100/-30)

Sex with animals found on farm.

  • Bestiality with other large animal (+100/-40)

Sex with animals that aren't normally domesticated.

  • Bestiality with small animal (+100/-?)

Sex involving an animal that is too small to copulate with.