Life Hacks/Relationship scores guide
This guide is to help get an idea of how certain characters will react in various situations according to their relationship scores.
Friend
Friendliness is how much a person wants to be around you and how likely they are to accommodate you or do things to get on your good side. This accommodation can include anything from common courtesies such as sharing or offering you a space at the table to turning a blind eye or covering for you if they suspect you have done something wrong.
- Low range
On the low end of the spectrum, they enjoy having you around but they rarely think of you before they think of themselves. They will give you all the common courtesies, but will not go out of their way to make things extra nice for you.
- Medium range
In the medium range, they will consider you someone they want to be around. They might choose you over other people in their social groups and will dislike it if people talk negatively about you. They will do favors for you that inconvenience them, and they will also cover for you if you have been accused of some form of wrong-doing so long as what you are suspected of (even if they know you did it) does not violate their own basic principles. (I.E. They will cover for you smoking pot, but they won't cover for you murdering someone.) While they will try to make it so you do not get in trouble for minor infractions, if they are reasonably intelligent (not a child and not a druggie) then they will be likely to intervene if they judge that what you are doing is potentially self destructive.
- High range
At the high friendliness range, the lines between friendship and love begin to blur, and they will bend over backwards to accommodate you in some ways that others may consider to be rather extreme. They will define you as a core part of their life, and if your behavior and values disagree with theirs then they will try to conform themselves to match you. It is still possible for them to intervene in cases of destructive behaviors at the lower end of the high range, and in fact their intervention will be a lot more dedicated if they are in this range, but once they pass a certain threshold (that is different depending on the person) they will begin to loose their objectivity when it comes to your wrong doing and they will begin to justify it or deny it and pretend it isn't happening instead. In order to reach this level of friendliness, trust will have to have already been high, and hitting this level of friendliness will cause it to become even higher.
Depending on their personality and their values, they may even actively cover for or even facilitate you in doing things that would be considered outright morally reprehensible, including the most detested crimes in society such as murder and child rape. It is only when it gets into new levels of depravity such as cannibalism or other things that stretch the imagination that they may not support you. (They still will not obstruct it in any form. They will just choose not to be involved.)
(Note: What counts as low, medium, and high is left purposefully undefined. This is to be considered a sliding scale, and it is up to the writer at the time to judge which end of the spectrum a character is more likely to fall on in terms of their behavior.)
Enemy
How generally negative a person's reaction is to you. Enemy status is essentially the exact opposite of friendliness. They do kind of horse-shoe in effect though in that greater levels of enemy status will have them obsessing over you more and more in the same way friendliness would. The true opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. In much the same way, to be an enemy toward you they will have to have you actively in their thoughts. (Note: It is actually not possible for someone to naturally reach the high range of enemy status without having a mental defect of some sort that causes them to become absolutely obsessive about you in their disgust.)
- Low range
At the low end, they will mostly do small things that involve actively denying you basic common courtesies. They will attempt to avoid you or exclude you from their social circle, and they will refuse to lift a finger to help you when you need someone to help you. So far as active antagonism goes, they will mostly stick to high-school level insults and biting remarks. However, if some form of severe misfortune did befall you they would still have some level of common human empathy for you. It may even cause them to feel bad about how they have been treating you.
- Medium range
They will actively wish harm upon you. If their values prevent them from harming you, they will just revel in it if something bad actually winds up happening. They are likely to scheme against you in order to make your life more difficult, although they will not go too far out of their way if doing so will cause them to loose social standing themselves. (They will do more to hinder you the greater your crime against them is, the greater your crime the more their social circles will be to understand their hatred of you.) Their activities to hinder you and make life more difficult for you can include spreading false rumors or watching you like a hawk and amplifying your legitimate screw-ups. They may make severe negative and de-humanizing remarks about you, and may become physical at the higher end of this range. Also at the higher end of this range, they may attempt to vandalize your personal property.
(Note: for a mentally stable person, this is the cap for how severe their enemy status can become naturally. Even if you tortured and murdered every one of their friends and family members they will not move above this level unless they have a severe mental defect, although if you did do those things then killing you is within the extents to witch their social circles may allow them to go witch will make that a reaction that is perfectly justifiable in this range.)
- High range
They will do anything to make you suffer. A person at this level is absolutely unhinged and they will not care about the consequences to themselves so long as you are harmed in the process. They will not care if others are hurt by their aggression toward you, and at the higher end they may even go to the extent of killing or torturing your loved ones. Their self-destructive hatred is so great that if you and them were in a desert and you found a large container of water, they would race ahead and dump it out so that you wouldn't even have the chance of snagging it from them in the time it would take them to get a drink for themselves.
(Note: What counts as low, medium, and high is left purposefully undefined. This is to be considered a sliding scale, and it is up to the writer at the time to judge which end of the spectrum a character is more likely to fall on in terms of their behavior.)
Dominant
Feels it is their right to tell another person what to do. (Note: someone with a dominance score may take issue with the one they are dominant over being the initiator of a sex act, even if they are in a sexual relationship. However, it is also entirely possible for the dominance and submissive roles to reverse the moment things become sexual. If this is the case, consider their sexual submissive score to be a complete reversal of their dominance score. See the sexual submissive section for details as this will only cover dominance both in a general and also in a sexual sense.)
- Low range
Will feel they always have the right to lead the conversation, and that they should naturally have control of any activities that are being performed with the person or people they are dominant over. They may be willing to cede control in certain situations where it seems appropriate. They are not likely to give orders to the people they are dominant over. Rather than being a task master, they are more likely to be a task controller. For instance, if they are cooking a meal, they will either relegate the person they are dominant over to sue-chef duties (chopping vegetables or grating cheese,) or just kick them out of the kitchen entirely. If they do tell the person they are dominant over to do something, it will usually be in the form of a request, although they might become a bit incensed if the request is refused.
In the case of being dominant to this level in a sexual relationship, they will accept their partner initiating sex acts, however they will feel the need to change the pace after a short time of doing what their partner wants in order to regain control.
- Medium range
Will feel more comfortable in actually ordering the person they are dominant over to do things. They will actually start to actively think of themselves as the dominant member of the relationship, and that their orders are expected to be followed. They will not be too domineering, the people they are dominant over are allowed to have their own lives, but attempts at going against their wishes had better come with a good reason. Active attempts at going against their demands will become a power struggle. This doesn't mean it will turn ugly, it is more that a verbal joust will begin in witch they will force the person who is disobeying to justify themselves in order to either correct their disobedience or at least get the message across that their behavior is unacceptable.
In the case of being dominant to this level in a sexual relationship, the most they will allow their partner to do in terms of initiating sex is to express in some way that they are horny. It will be the dominant partner that gets to set the time and place where the submissive partner will be satisfied though. However, the expression of their partner's horniness will make them feel somewhat obligated to state it sooner rather than later.
- High range
Will demand that their word be treated as the ultimate authority in the relationship. They will take to micro-managing the life of the person they are dominant over, not permitting them to take any significant action without their permission. Hanging out with their friends will be one of these significant actions, and they may even attempt to say what friends they are and are not allowed to have. They will not tolerate dissent, even if the person they are dominant over has a perfectly reasonable objection.
In the case of being dominant to this level in a sexual relationship, they will not even view the partner they are dominant over as having the right to refuse sex. Their requirements for the other partner initiating sex is the same as in the medium range, however they will not feel so obligated to oblige their partner's sexual desires and might even refuse them sex on the basis of putting them in their place by causing them sexual frustration. It is highly likely that they might get into BDSM just for the sake of further asserting their dominance in the sexual relationship.
(Note: What counts as low, medium, and high is left purposefully undefined. This is to be considered a sliding scale, and it is up to the writer at the time to judge which end of the spectrum a character is more likely to fall on in terms of their behavior.)
Submissive
A tendency in a person to bend to another person's will. Submissiveness is a natural subservience, and it is a surrendering of the job of decision making to the person they are submissive to. There is not quite as big a difference between being generally submissive and sexually submissive as there is with dominance, but there is still the likelihood that someone who is generally submissive could become dominant in the bedroom. However, the ways a generally submissive person communicates the desire for sex may be different.
- Low range
At the low range, the submissive person will prefer to go with the flow rather than attempt to direct activities within a group that includes someone they are submissive to. This will usually be at a subconscious level. They will still fearlessly speak their mind if the opportunity happens to come up, but they will not make the effort to muscle their way in and push for that chance to speak. In terms of following orders, they may push back if they are blatantly told to do something, but they are more likely to comply with reasonable requests.
Sexually, someone who is submissive at this level is likely to make their desire for sex known by touching and getting affectionate with their partner, but unless they are really sexually frustrated they are not likely to actually initiate the sex themselves. Rather, they will make their desire known and leave it up to their partner to notice and act on it. If they do not desire sex and their partner does, they might be persuaded go along with it if it is an established sexual relationship and their partner comes in with the right approach, but if they have not had sex before then they are likely to refuse.
- Medium range
At the medium range, the submissive person will be more clearly deferrent to the person they are submissive to. They will not take abuse from them, but they are not likely to resist if they are outright ordered to do something. They may also start to think preemptively in terms of how to accommodate the person they are submissive to, and in terms of acting according to the wishes of the person they are subservient to they will behave as though they are always in the room and refuse to do something they don't like at any time.
Sexually, someone who is submissive at this level will do most of the things in the previous category to make their desire for sex known, but they will not initiate a sex act even if they are dying of sexual frustration. Rather, they will just make their desire for sex more clear but leave it up to their partner to decide whether or not to act on it. If they do not desire sex and their partner does, if there is an established sexual relationship then they will submit to it even if it would make things inconvenient for them. If they do not have an established sexual relationship then the approach is key to whether or not they will submit to it. They will have to be put in a place where they feel like sex is expected and required of them in this sort of situation. (It is easier to manipulate a sexually inexperienced teen or young college student in this manner. Children with no sexual knowledge in the first place cannot be manipulated in this manner, but other approaches might be possible if their nudity and sexual touching taboo is not too strong.)
(Note: There is some wiggle room as to what can be considered the upper end of this level of submissiveness depending on how naturally submissive the person in question is.)
- High range
(Note: it is not possible for a mentally stable adult to naturally reach this level of submissiveness. They will have to have their will broken in some way (or game hacks or relationship modifying reward could be applied) A child can easily reach this range of submissiveness though with the right grooming, and having been groomed to this level of submissiveness as a child is a way to have an adult become susceptible to this level of submissiveness. Other means of breaking an adult in this way are occasionally hap-hazardly used by abusive domestic partners and more frequently used in a calculated way by slave traders.)
At the high range, the submissive person will submit to almost anything the dominant partner wants of them, and this does not only include things that could be considered abusive to them. At the higher end, they will even stand idly by and permit their friends and loved ones to be abused by the partner they are submissive to and not do a single thing to intervene. It may even be their opinion it is the dominant partner's right to be doing that and that the friend or loved one should just submit as they do.
Sexually, someone who is submissive at this level no longer thinks about whether or not they want sex. The only question is whether or not their dominant partner wants sex. At the higher end they will even allow themselves to be pimped out by their partner if that is what is desired of them. There is no question of them not wanting sex if a sexual relationship has been established. If a sexual relationship has not been established, a sexually mature and aware person may resist being pimped but they will not resist sex from their dominant partner. A sexually ignorant child will not resist their partner either, although the exact reactions may differ a little.
(Note: What counts as low, medium, and high is left purposefully undefined. This is to be considered a sliding scale, and it is up to the writer at the time to judge which end of the spectrum a character is more likely to fall on in terms of their behavior.)
Trust
Trust is how comfortable a person is with the idea/how much they believe that you will not do anything to harm them or their loved ones, and that you have their best interests in mind. This trust allows them to drop their guard and not worry about the things that you might do.
- Low range
At the low range, they trust that you are not a dangerous person. You probably have the same basic values and decency as any other normal person, and they do not have to worry about you doing something horrible to them or their loved ones. There may be a little bit of concern in their mind when it comes to giving you sensitive tasks such as babysitting their children, but if they are in a pinch then they will trust you with such a task.
If they become suspicious of you while you are trusted at this level, rumors and whispers that you might be untrustworthy and might do something in the future will prevent you from raising to the next tier in levels of trust, but they will not accuse you without evidence.
- Medium range
At the medium range, their trust of your character may improve and they will also come to trust your capability. They are more likely to give you tasks to do, and once you are on the job they will stop worrying about it as they will be sure you will get it done right. However, if the task they are trusting you with involves a skill, you must have demonstrated in the past at some point that you possess that skill. You may be trusted with more sensitive stuff as well. In the example of babysitting, they will not even hesitate to trust you with their children. You are also more likely to be trusted with sensitive information to the family if they have a secret that could cause some social problems with their friend groups. At the higher end, you may even be trusted with things that could get them in some minor legal trouble if such a thing exists.
If they become suspicious of you while you are trusted at this level, they will not accept rumors of your possible future actions. There has to be evidence that something has already happened and a reasonable line of logic to say it is possible you were the one who did it. If this comes up, they will need actual evidence stating that you were in fact the one who did it, but even if there isn't the fact that suspicion is cast on you will prevent you from raising to higher levels of trustworthiness.
- High range
At the high range, they will really not even think of the possibility you might do something to violate their trust, either in terms of betrayal or in terms of failure. If they are going to trust you with a task that requires a skill, they will take your word for it if you tell them you have that skill. If there is a secret in the family that could cause them to be arrested or worse if it is revealed, they will trust you not to spread that information if you were to find out.
It will be hard for them to become suspicious of you having done something to violate their trust. They will have to be presented with evidence, and the evidence would have to come from someone who they at least trust to a medium range. That evidence would also have to be to a level that it would hold up in a court of law. (themselves being the judge.) For instance, if their daughter tells them you raped her, the daughter would either have to be highly trusted by them as well or they would need a DNA test proving it was you before they fully accepted this accusation.
(Note: What counts as low, medium, and high is left purposefully undefined. This is to be considered a sliding scale, and it is up to the writer at the time to judge which end of the spectrum a character is more likely to fall on in terms of their behavior.)
Fear
Fear is divided into three categories. Perceived threat to self, perceived threat to others, and threat of self harm. In this case "threat to self" refers to harming the person who has the fear stat, and "threat of self harm" refers to the person the fear stat is in regards to harming themselves. There are occasions where someone may fear more than one outcome, but the behaviors that result will reflect the one that is the strongest.
Note that fear does not always refer to a physical threat, especially in the threat to self and threat of self harm categories. The former presents commonly in the form of a child fearing punishment from a disciplinarian parent, and the latter in the form of fear they may ruin their future livelihood prospects rather than injure or kill themselves. It could also refer to their behaviors being dangerous and inviting harm from an outside source, such as them being raped and/or kidnapped by a stranger.
Fears threat to self
Fear of personal harm is the fear that the subject of the fear might cause some negative result to the person who feels the fear. This is not necesarily physical harm. A child might fear punishment from a parent, a friend or sibling might fear the subject will hate them and abandon them, and someone might also fear their possessions could be damaged by the subject of their fear.
Note: This form of fear can be used to achieve absolutely any effect that could be achieved with the same levels of submissiveness. The big difference between achieving this through fear Vs. submission is that they may or may not be Ok with doing said thing if they submit to it normally, but if they submit due to fear they will always hate being made to do it. Even if it is something they would normally enjoy under other circumstances, they will not like having been forced to do it by you.
- 10% Uncomfortable
They feel uneasy while you are around, but do not have a particular reason they can point to to justify this unease.
- 30% Avoidance
They feel it is best not to be around you if you can be avoided, just in case. May or may not have a reason to justify this fear.
- 50% Afraid
Self acknowledges they are afraid, and can probably find a justifiable reason as to why they are afraid. Will have difficulty confronting you or standing up to you. (Any encounter that would decrease dominance will reduce it by larger amounts until it reaches 0%. Only effective if dominance was originally lower than 50%)
- 70% Debilitating fear
Are afraid of you enough that they loose the ability to oppose you for fear of what you might do in response. (Any encounter that would increase submissiveness will increase it more until it reaches 50%, can now increase negative hits to dominance up to 100% as well.)
- 90% Absolute terror
Will do every single thing you say for fear of what you will do to them if they don't. Is no different in outcome from having 100% submission.
Fears threat to others
Fear of threat to others is the fear that the subject of the fear may harm the firends or loved ones of the person feeling the fear. This fear can present in all the same forms as that of threat to self (except that fearing they might hate their loved ones tends to not produce as strong a reaction as they would fearing the same thing for themselves,) the biggest difference between the two is the type of reaction they will have. Rather than submitting due to the fear, someone who fears the threat to others is more likely to become dominant with the subject of the fear in order to prevent the harm from coming.
- 10% Uneasy
They feel uneasy while you and their loved one are interacting, but do not have a particular reason they can point to to justify this unease.
- 30% Cautious
They feel it is best to keep you away from their loved one, just in case. May or may not have a reason to justify this fear.
- 50% Afraid
Self acknowledges they are afraid, and can probably find a justifiable reason as to why they are afraid. Will likely become belligerent in order to ward you off if you are around. (Any encounter that would increase dominance will increase it by larger amounts until it reaches 70%. Only effective if dominance was originally higher than 20%)
- 70% Sees as true threat.
Feels that reasonable tactics to keep you away from their loved ones will not work, and that you actually intend them direct harm if you come around. Is likely to get the police involved at this level, go to the extreme of physically fighting you to ward you off, or may even try to kill you for the protection of their loved ones.
- 90% Hopeless fear
Sees you as a threat that can't be stopped, akin to a force of nature that they cannot do anything about such as a tornado or a disease. They will not try to prevent you from harming their loved ones because they don't see a way they can stop it. (Note: This level of fear of this veriety is most common in children fearing the subject of the fear will harm their parents or older siblings. It also appears in people with 70% greater fear of personal harm from the same source.)
Fears threat of self harm
The fear that the subject may harm themselves is the one form of fear that can be fostered even with an otherwise healthy relationship going (although it tends to harm trust.) This is the fear that the subject may damage their life, livelihood, or body in some way. This is usually through carelessness having an accident or engaging in behaviors that make them vulnerable to attacks from others, but a threat of intentional self harm is something that is known to happen and produces some of the higher levels of fear in this category if the subject is identified to have leanings in that direction.
- 10% Uneasy
Has no proof that the subject will harm themselves or engage in dangerous practices. This level is more a cluster of thinking about various "what if?" scenarios that could happen to you but they don't think are entirely likely to happen.
- 30% Concerned
Still does not have a solid basis for their perceived fear, but will ensure you have supervision from someone they have a trust score with in order to prevent one of those "what if?" scenarios from occurring.
- 50% Fear
Can name a specific likely outcome that could result from your activities. Will begin limiting your freedoms for the sake of your own protection to prevent the event that they fear. However, they still trust you enough to act according to the limitations they place on you.
- 70% Self threat
View normal prevention tactics as not being enough to protect you from your own dangerous activities. Will either act on their own to limit your freedoms, or try to ensure you have someone watching you at all times who they have at least a 50% trust score with.
- 90% Extreme fear
Knows (in their own mind) for certain that, if left to your own devices, you are going to do irreparable harm to yourself and will defy every effort they make to prevent it. May go to either one of two extreme reactions. Either give you up for lost and act as though mourning you while you are still alive, or have you institutionalized or arrested for your own good figuring that having you locked up with supervision and help available is better than the alternative.
Familial/platonic love
How accepting of non-sexual gestures of closeness this person is, and how forgiving they are of a person's faults.
Lust/romantic love
How willing this person would be to do something sexual in nature with the person they have this score with. Note that in children below age 14 willingness to do something sexual has more to do with their curiosity and their trust and friendship with the proposed sexual partner. As such, lust and romantic love are not connected and a child below that age will substitute trust and friendship scores for romance so long as romance is still 1/10 the required level.
General
Note: This only measures scores for convincing them to perform a sex act they were not ready to do before hand. If they initiate the sex act, they can initiate it with a score of 0.
(Sex act thresholds are measured in groups of 20 without a top-end buffer zone. This is because there is a break-down of inbetween values for each act, but these increments of 20 are the top ends of each category.)
- 20+
Will see any action categorized as a "benign sex act" as a natural and appropriate gesture of closeness for this stage of their relationship.
- 40+
Will see any action categorized as a "dismissable sex act" as a natural and appropriate gesture of closeness for this stage in their relationship, and will be perfectly Ok with it even if they are aware it is being done in a sensual manner.
- 60+
Will see any action categorized as a "mild sex act" (except french kissing for children) as a natural and appropriate gesture of closeness for this stage in their relationship.
- 80+ Will see most actions categorized as a "moderate sex act" (provided they do not take issue with a particular act on principal) as a natural and appropriate thing to do at this stage in their relationship.
- 100 Will see sexual intercourse as a natural and appropriate thing to do at this stage in their relationship. (Might demand a condom if worried about pregnancy.)
NOTE: No level of romantic love unlocks violent or fetish sex as something they will be accepting of. They must either have a high submissive score or be naturally into that kind of sex to start with.
Consent minimums
The links below list the numbers a person's relationship scores have to be at for them to consent to a sex act. The 1st link shows the minimums for each foreseeable sex act that might be performed, the second shows how you determine witch value is used. (6 of the 8 factors are candidates for being the primary score determining whether or not they will consent to a sex act depending on other factors that may be present.) And the 3rd lists factors that might modify the scores listed in the 1st link.
WARNING: The math in there gets a little complicated. It was comprised by one of the nerd-brains that took a mutual shared lead on this project. Any other writer who wants to contribute really does not need to know the contents of this page. Following the simplified numbers above will keep you very safely on the right page. The numbers thrown about in there have mostly to do with how to get consent with numbers lower than those given in this basic guide in a way that sort of more or less reflects real life in a game mechanics sort of way.