Talk:Smooth Operator

From All The Fallen Stories
Revision as of 10:20, 23 February 2019 by Claws61821 (talk | contribs)
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Okay yeah. That's pretty much what I meant, BluePanda. Thanks for adding that. Claws61821 (talk) 03:05, 23 February 2019 (CET)

I updated it just now, with a better synopses tell me what you think when you get a chance. BluePanda (talk) 20:56, 22 February 2019 (CET)

It looks good. Might want to find a way to break up the first section into shorter sentences and a few different paragraphs, though; it's a slightly awkward read on mobile in its current layout. Claws61821 (talk) 09:45, 23 February 2019 (CET)

It's a pretty interesting scenario. Also, with this back-story, wouldn't Jordan having sex with 6 and 7 year olds still be considered illegal? Then again, statutory rape could be downgraded to a misdemeanor for juveniles. At any rate, the one thing it leaves out is just how adaptable society can be. Given this scenario, 1 male to every 160 females would change sexual dynamics a great deal. It would very much be society flipped on its head to where males were considered sexually innocent in everything they do and women would really be throwing themselves at any and all fertile males. If he was caught having sex with an underage girl, he would most likely just be scolded a little for wasting his semen on someone who can't get pregnant and encouraged to do it with an older girl, likely with an offer attached to it. Jemini (talk) 09:58, 23 February 2019 (CET)

Actually, this change in back story would alter a LOT of things. For one, younger girls are less likely to even know what a penis is unless the society has shifted to start giving them a very explicit sex education from a rather early age in order to make them more receptive to a boy having sex with them. For two, it would mean a lot of the girls who don't know Jordan would be more likely to be surprised when they realize it's a boy talking to them and might get a lot more nervous. All this said, I actually really like unusual scenarios like this. I'm willing to go through and make the necessary alterations if you want. I just need to know whether or not you want to go the route of the early and explicit sex education. (Personally, as someone who likes ignorant impregnation and finds the innocence angle appealing, I would prefer not. However, as the one who started this story, it's entirely up to you.) Jemini (talk) 10:04, 23 February 2019 (CET)

So, can I take the lack of a mention of early sex education in your recent update (that was after I made the 2 above posts) as confirmation on there not being explicit sex education in this setting? Also, what do you want to do with the 2 mentions of other boys at Gabby's party? It would be believable for there to be 1 other boy, but 2 is pushing it a little as having 3 boys under the same roof in a house full of girls in such a society would likely make everyone think the boys were invited explicitly in the hopes they would be doing something sexual with the girls. If it's just 1 other boy, it can be waved off as a coincidence where the younger boy was invited normally and the older boy Jordan just happened to show up. Jemini (talk) 10:59, 23 February 2019 (CET)

Taking the last few messages into account, my recommendation would be to lessen the severity of the impotency epidemic. If you change the 1:160 ratio to something still significant but far less extreme, you can keep most of your important plot elements and some major cultural changes without, as Jemini mentioned, making young boys as rare as hens' teeth and making their presence some sordid proclamation. Claws61821 (talk) 11:20, 23 February 2019 (CET)